What has seven legs and cant walk? A paraplegic, and I lied about five of those legs.

Yo mama soooooo dumb! You should really take her to a doctor, she might actually suffer from mental retardation, I'm just concerned about her.

why was the mother sad? her sons school was bombed by terrorists. there we no survivors

Why did the blonde turn down prostitution? She knows it is illegal and has better moral values than that.

What did the boy get at the bowling alley for his birthday? a corpse. *from Bones

Yo momma so old some said act ur age and she dies

Why did the chicken cross the road? Apple

What did God say to the man who just died? Nothing. God and Heaven something parents make up so kids will do the right thing.

I like my women like I like my coffee.......... I don't like coffee

whats worse than a wussy times two a wusst times three i like boobs u basterds suck a dick

How many pancakes do you need to reach a 2.5m roof? Purple, because aliens don't fly

what did the leprosy survivor get for christmas a amputation

How many blondes does it take to play a game of hide and seek? One ... ;)

what did the blind kid boy get for Christmas? he doesn't know because his parents are mute.

What do you call a Mexican with a lawnmower? The guy I'm thinking of is named Pedro. He works hard and takes care of his family.

Whats the difference between a watermelon and babies I don't have a pile of dead watermelon in my basement

What do you call 5 black guys at the bottom of the ocean? scuba divers

Q: Why did the black man run from the chainsaw? A: Someone was trying to kill him with it.

Do they censor Ass? TESTING TESTING ASS ASS ASS

want to get screwed for four years? VOTE REFUGLYCAN!

hey i just met you,but this is crazy, my name is kony and i just took your baby

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walked into a prison. A gang stopped them, and said: Hey, want to play a game? Before they could run away, the gang leader told them the rules. You go over there and stand by the wall. You close your eyes, and then we fire a shotgun in your direction. The last one alive wins. They push the brunette onto the wall. She closes her eyes because she knows she's about to die and doesn't want her friends to see her crying. The gun goes off, and she falls to the ground, dead. They pull away her dead body. They decide it's the redhead's turn next. They move her onto the wall. Being the brightest one in the bunch, she tries to keep her eyes open. However, she blinks. The gun goes off, and she falls to the ground, dead. They pull away her dead body. Then the blonde bursts out laughing. "Your friends are dead. And you're about to die. Do you find that funny?" They ask. She answers. "No. It's just- I won the game!"

What smells like diarrhea and looks like poop? A rotten banana.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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