A mother is sitting with her son at the park. A nearby man suddenly breaks into uncontrollable coughing. The mother leans over to her son and whispers, 'Smoker's cough.' The son never takes up smoking.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Q:Whats the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? A:One less drunk

thumb_up thumb_down -27

How do you call the uncle who molested you as a child? More than likely with a telephone.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Knock knock? Who is there? Nobody. Those were noises coming from your head.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What do you call someone who doesn't have a soul? A ginger

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Where do bees go to the bathroom? In the hive - they're incontinent.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

whats worse than breaking your arm? getting raped by a squirel

thumb_up thumb_down -27

how do you know if your pleasuring a woman? who cares

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Phew, I was like thinking all like "I am really into this guy, we can like chat like this and stuff too right?"

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Skinny people fart less.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

why did the man have a hole in his face? because syphillis had eaten a hole in it

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Q: How could the black man afford to buy a TV? A: He had a well-paying job and a supporting family.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

How do you kill a blonde? A gun.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

- Knock knock - Who's there - James - James who ? - James Redwood.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why was the 18 year boy afraid of his dad? Cause his dad butt raped him when he was 7.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

The closest I've been to an animal charity was when I walked past it to by myself a fur coat

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Then help me understand Nero, people had the free and legal right to decide to be a part of our, or your society if you prefer, where has that option gone now? Where is the people that choose to believe in their own potential and in the one of their equals? Today we live in a society where its basically pop culture to dislike oneself, where it is considered narcissism to like oneself, and you know that we have both been affected, while those we considered allies before, have joined the same people that branded us evil.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What's funnier than a chicken? nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Your mamas so poor she cant even afford to support a family

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why did the girl drop her sucker? she was hit by a truck!

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What's even better than finding 10 bucks in your pocket? Getting into heaven.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What's red white, blue and hilarious? Glasgow Rangers in administration!

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Roses are Red Your Face Has Turned Blue This Pillow I have Is Smothering You

thumb_up thumb_down -29

why do girls like grey's anatomy so much? because they are girls

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops