What is an Indian's favourite country? North Currya

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Bob Saget

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Q: Why didn't the blonde answer the call from her boyfriend? A: She had died in a rollover the day before.

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why did kermit cry?Ms.Piggy knocked him out on Christmas and he slept through the party and all of the presents

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? depends on how hard you throw them

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What's the difference between a dead baby and my dinner??? Nothing...

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Whats worse tan finding a worm in your apple? Being touched by Michael Jackson

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Your mom is so stupid that her parents were probably ashamed of her low grades.

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what has wheels and drives? a boat i lied about the wheels

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roses are red violets are blue i've got alzheimer's ...

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the lemon was sweet.

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Why did Sally have a headache? She had a Brian tumor the size of an eggplant.

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hey chris what yu doing wit my back pack? using it..

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Why can't Heller Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Auntie.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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why did the chicken cross the road? its a chicken giving it the tendencies to wander if not properly fenced in.

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There is a blonde, a redhead, and a brunnette stuck on a deserted island. the redhead gets sick of being trapped, so she decides to risk the 100 miles back to shore. she begins swimming, gets 10 miles out, gets tired, and drowns. the brunnette gets sick of being trapped, so she decides to risk it too. she gets 50 miles, gets tired, and drowns. The blonde decides to escape as well. she is able to swim 98 miles, gets tired, and swims back.

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how do you save a black person that's drowning? you blow up their lips

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Hold on, please hold on! I will explain, it is my name, but I don't know whats so wrong with it at all... Please give me five minutes, I need to use the bathroom, please don't go just yet, don't be mad at me, what have I done wrong now? I mean if you are gonna go to sleep or something please do not be upset with me.

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why did the woman leave her husband? after years of mental and physical abuse she has decided to remove herself from the situation

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It was at the war and there was a camp site where a doctors helped injured soldiers. One soldier comes in the door and holds his arm. The doctor says "You got shot in the arm?" He says yes. Then another soldier walks in the door and holding his shoulder. The doctor says "You got shot in the shoulder?" He says yes. Then another soldier walks in the door and was dragging his left leg across the floor. The doctor says "You got shot in your leg?" The soldier says "No, I stepped on dog shhhttt."

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Why did the muslim cross the road? To blow up a train

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops