How do you stop a little boy from annoying you? You chop his balls of. Why was the little boy sad? Because someone chopped his balls off.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

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What do you call two black men riding on a tandem bicycle? Best friends.

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: One.

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Whats a Quires favorite type of sport?--- A contact sport

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he got shot in the face. Why couldn't the boy get back on the swing? He had no arms. Why didnt his mum come and save him? She is blind, deaf and in a wheelchair.

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What's the difference between a melon? One of its halves are both the same.

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What does a black man and a monkey have in common? Until February 3rd 1870 neither could vote in America. Monkeys still can't. 

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What's the meaning of life? I don't know.

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What did the old man say after he fell down? nothing.

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What do you get when you stab a baby? A dead baby.

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What do you get when u cross a owl and a bungy cord...........my ass

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Whats worse than the death of a celebrity? An anonymous person posting a joke on this site.

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What's better than winning a million dollars? Winning 2 million dollars!

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What did the penguin wearing a blue sweater say to the sink? I am a penguin wearing a blue sweater.

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Nero, I can barely stay awake, can we chat more later today though? I would really enjoy that, and sleep before that.

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What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - I am a lawyer and you're a doctor.

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1.Why were the black men asked to leave the bar? Because it was a womens bar. 2.Why did the 40 year old get an erection? Because he was excited.

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What's the best part about the school burning down? All the children trapped inside never had to grow up

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A fat black guy walks into a pet store and asks if he can have a chicken. The cashier says "what do you want a chicken for?" He says " I need to lose weight so I'm hoping to eat its all natural eggs" So the cashier gives him the chicken and the fat black guy lost 50 pounds.

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Q. why did the skeleton crosse the rood. A. he didin`t becas he had no guts

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Um...thats impossible because chickens live on farms theyre are no roads....

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Across the street was a strip mall containing a dry cleaners where he had to pick up his suit for his cousins wedding. The wedding caused controversy in the family considering she was jewish. He had a lot to drink and took a cab home, knowing the dangers of drunk driving in todays society. He had a great time.

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What do you call a blonde that just got hit by a school bus? Dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops