What would Bruno Mars do if he was on the moon? Gasp and grab his throat in an attempt to get oxygen flowing into his lungs with no avail.

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Why did the Asian ace the test? Because she had worked very diligently, taken copious notses, and studied fervently until she had a thorough mastery of the topic.

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"What's wrong?" "I can't fap." "Why not?" "Because I saw your face."

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What's black and White and black and White? A nun falling down a stairs

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Why did the teenage girl pee on a stick? She and her boyfriend had foolishly engaged in unprotected sex two weeks before, and she was now concerned that she may be pregnant.

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A baby walks into a bar and the bartender says.... Where is your mom?

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Justin beiber..

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If I tell you that seeing you happy, is my main motivation towards accepting right now, would you believe me?

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A girl walked into a bar and sat next to a man. She asked what he was drinking. He said something that makes you fly. She didn't believe him. He then went up to the roof, jumped off and walked back in the front door. She got the drink then tried to jump off the roof, and died on impact. The bartender said to the man "You're a real asshole when you're drunk superman."

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Why won't Santa be delivering presents this year? Because he can't be bothered.

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A man walks into a bar. Ow

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when the zombie apocolypse comes what do you do? you die

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Yes.

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What did the drunk man say to the average civilian? Blahaahahahahahuhuh!

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What's worse than fingering your sister and finding your father's wedding ring ? 3 bee stings.

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(sniff) (sniff) It smells like gross diarrhea in here... (sniff) (sniff) ... Yeah it does

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A blond, a brunette, and a redhead all entered their designated classrooms to begin AP testing. They all worked extraordinarily hard to earn a passing grade and receive college credit. The brunette and the redhead received passing, yet average, grades. The blond also received a score that reflected the amount of effort she put into studying and memorizing the material, because there is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

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What did the mentally retarded man say to the Waiter who brought him his soup? Thanks for bringing me my soup.

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Life gives you lemons you make lemonade. What do you do when life gives you melons... youre skrewed.

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Why did the referee go to the zoo? He likes animals

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War horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'why the long film?'

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People shouldnt make fun of holocaust jokes..my grandpa died cause of it! he fell off the gaurd tower

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What's the difference between a Pile of Dead Babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamboghini in my garage

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In Soviet Russia, people commonly suffered under the might of the communist juggernaut. It was unpleasant.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops