What is the biggest lie that's still close to the truth? You came out of your momma's asshole.

Why dont jews eat pork? Because the torah doesnt allow cannibalism

What did the teenage boy do when his mum was out shopping? Finish his homework.

OK, Billy went to his friend Fred in the tree. And then went inside to get a snack. Then Fred fell out of the Tree and.....landed on a comfy mattress.

What is long, hard, and full of semen? An erected penis.

Wanna see me count to ten? 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10.

What's worse than a dead baby? A baby.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender who recently got out of federal prison after a 20 year sentence.

Two kiwis are in a fridge. Suddenly, the door opens, and one of them is pulled out by a human hand. He was never to be seen again.

Colin is gay but toasters are not

A dog walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer The barman replies : Woof Woof

The Lord said to John: "Go forth and receive eternal life" But John went fifth... So he won a toaster

hers a joke... japanese people

Once there was Girl whose Teeth were Crooked. She got Braces.

What's green and doesn't fly? A broken green helicopter.

Naturally I meant to say "Its no fun even when they DO scream in pain" below... What do you think I got? Pleasure? Your friendly r*pist Moral Man: Of course I got pleasure! ;) But I wont share with you!

Knock-Knock Who's there? We are, now open the door! Wait im masturbating!!

A guy walks into a bar

How do black guys say hi to each other? Hi.

Uhh, yeah, some of it, I mean people never looked me in the eyes on the buss really, I dunno,if you think I am pretty maybe it is just your opinion or something, but thanks, you are hones and its nice. Never been out drinking, I am you know, kinda nerdy, I just prefer hanging out with friends at home.

BLACK PEOPLE! (im black so its not racist)

Have u seen stevie wonders new house? No. Niether has he

Pigachu is a Porkemon.

Why didn't the man go to work on Friday the 13th? Because he was unemployed.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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