This ones for the dudes: Whats worse then having sex with a woman with no penis? Having se with a man

what do you have to do to confuse a blond? Nothing

Why was Little Billy sad? Because he got shot.

How did the newborn baby come out of a man? It was ejaculated as a sperm from his testicles

Q: Why did the Westboro Baptist Church picket the gay marine’s funeral? A: Homosexuals are a plague sent by Satan to destroy the fabric of America.

One walrus says to the other, "Why are you shaking like that?" The other walrus says, " I've been addicted to ectasy for three years. It's ruining my life."

A dyslexic atheist stays up at night wondering if there is a Dog

Roses are brown Violets are brown Who pooped in my garden?

What type of jobs do black people have? That depends entirely on their qualifications and suitability to the relevant role.

A woman stopped making sandwiches.

You know what rhymes with sloth? Rape.

What do you call a Mexican that sails a ship? A sailor

Whats smells like a banana and is purple? A banana, I lied about the purple thing.

So I went to an audition, my friend said "break a leg" And then I did

What did Helen Keller do at a concert? Sit.

What did the Catholic Priest say to the Altar Boy shortly after sex? Nothing. The feelings of shame and revulsion the priest felt about what he had just done meant he couldn't look him in the eye let alone talk to him.

What do you call a midget driving a train? A conductor

What do you call a black guy that feeds children? A waiter

what is big and can make things come out? a gun

Why wasn't the little boy allowed to get a dog? Because the orphanage he lives at doesn't allow dogs.

What's the quickest way to a man's heart? A knife.

What doesn't kill you leaves you in a coma.

Mommy, why did daddy leave? Because you touch yourself at night sweetie.

Why was lil' Susie screaming horrifically? Nobody knows. That's why the neighbors called the cops. -Harrison

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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