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My ex wife looks like a pitbull.

How do you kill a squirrel? Take the jaws of life. Rip it in half. And suck on the organs.

Chuck Norris gets punched in the face.

Why did the man get in a car accident? Because he was blind.

what happened to the retarded dyslexic? he retard on his 60th birthday and took up gardening.

Roses are red, Violets are Violate and not fucking blue.

You played so good! No, I played well. Okay??

Q. Why dont people like shane murchan ? A. Because he wears chinos .....

Why did the little boy leave his bike on the side of the road? He was kidnapped and his body was found 2 weeks later at Penn State

Did you hear about the man with the bicycle? He was 2 tired.

How do you confuse a blonde? Ask her a very challenging question.

I don't drink. I'm not 21.

Q: What was the pirate movie rated? A: PG-13 for violence and brief nudity.

Why doesn't superman eat peanuts? Because he doesn't like them.

1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

Why does the cow eat grass? A: Because it's green. (Cows are colorblind)

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Stolen cheese

Yo momma so normal, she got married, had three kids and then lived a dull but contented life.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to

what this: b a dead one of these: p

What did the man do when he crossed the road? Nothing he got hit by a car

Why wad six afraid of seven? Because seven was a sexual offender.

A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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