A man walks into a chiropractor. The chiropractor asked whats wrong with you? The man replies My boner has scoliosis.

Q. What do you call a white guy with a black dick? A. Gay

Why don't vampires like garlic? Every vampires was raped by a garlic salesman.

What is orange and sticky? A blue ice cream with no skeletal structure Hang on, Ice Creams don't talk and the ice cream wasn't even yellow!

Kindness is what makes the world go round..... and chocolate.

What do you say to the woman who just got raped? Nothing you just raped her

How do you fit 10,000,000 jews inside a car? It's not physically possible as no car can carry that many people.

Who's dumb and retarted. A person that is dumb and retarted.

Boob

What is green and has wheels???? Yo mamma on a Wednesday.

What did the Turkey say on Thanksgiving? Gobble gobble.

why wont me daughter eat my feces

Bob Saget

What do you call a shark on land A dead shark

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is dead. Dead people can't drive.

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

Knock, knock. Whose there? A Mountain Lion wait...what

I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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A grandfather clock fucked my bicycle!

Why was David enjoying his cream of mushroom soup? Because David had spent the last 17 days eating flouescent light fix-ins.

YOUR MOMMA IS SO FAT WHEN SHE JUMPED FOR JOY........she didn't get stuck because there's nothing to get stuck in.

one morning i turned on my tv

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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