What were the muslims doing on the plane? Probably going somewhere that was too far to walk or drive.... just like everyone else on the plane.

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What do you call someone trying to be funny? An anti-comedian.

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What did the man say to his doctor?

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What's the difference between a porcupine and a BMW? A porcupine has it's pricks on the outside. A BMW doesn't have pricks on it's bodywork, for a multitude of reasons: - it would increase the coefficient of drag, causing an increase in fuel consumption - the pricks would fall foul of pedestrian safety regulations

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What did the man say to his wife before she made him a sandwhich? Do your job and make me a sandwhich.

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What did Sherlock Holmes say when he saw a very pretty lady? Hello

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Q: What do you call half of the worlds population of black people on the moon. A: Close enough.

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What do you call a cow painted in red a cat ( PS : i lied about the cow + the paint ! )

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga in the morning You poke her face

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What's worst then getting struck by lightening? your face.whats worse then seeing your face? NOTHING

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What is an antijoke? Not Knock

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer murdered his family

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silver bullet?

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A blonde lady has a sore throat. Her colleague tells her that whenever she has a sore throat, she performs oral sex on her husband and swallows, and this cures the problem. The next day, the blonde comes into work. The colleague asks if she followed her advice, and the blonde says yes and it worked. The blonde also passes a message from her boyfriend thanking her colleague for the suggestion. The two sets of spouses eventually became close friends and were godparents to each others' children.

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Knock Knock DAMMIT WOMAN MAKE ME A SAMMACH

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Your mom is so old, that when somebody told her to act her age, she died.

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Why did the black guy drink the kool aid? Because there was a glass of kool aid next to him and he was thirsty.

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So my girlfriend comes back from Jamaica this weekend. There are as many hairs per square inch on your body as a chimpanzee.

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What do you call a dog with no arms and no legs? Nothing, it cant come

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What has two legs and can't walk. Someone thats paralyzed!

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A man walks into a bar and sees another man crying at the other end he asked what's wrong the man replies well its a long story I have time replyed the other man ok well me and my wife are always arguing. So I divided to go to the library after hours of reading I see a book about history and as im reading it its time to go home and when I was going to check it out I forgot my library card I get home and me and my wife make up and have a baby thats not bad at all said the other man yea you've never lost ur library card

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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hello i hav a growing interes in math and arithmetic especially when it involves pi if u are still reading this you either didnt realize that this was a joke or just didnt care but most likely it means that the first line interested or bored u and u wanted to find out wut the rest was u like????

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When the poop hits the fan and you walk in with your pants around your ankles, it's a bad sign!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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