Three men walk into a bar, one ducks and two fall down. What happened? They walked into a metal bar, like a sideways flagpole!

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he was very hungrey and saw some seed on the other side.

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If a plane crashes on the boarder of Canada and The U.S.A- Where would they burry the survivors.

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HEYEEYAHEYAYYAEEAHHAAA

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Two cows grazing by the road. One says hey what's all this about mad cows running around? I wonder what is it like? The other says I don't know I'm a helicopter.

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What did the gay man see when he looked out the window? A UPS truck that was shipping a monkey

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What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot, racist.

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What did the leper say to the prostitute? "How much?! No thanks, I think I'll shop around."

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What happens when an alien touches fire? It gets burnt

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Why did the Hispanic man have drugs in his pocket? He had just gone to the pharmacy.

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whats a joke... Parker Coffey at life

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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What's the difference between Miley Cyrus and a dead baby? One is a popular singer and the other is a dead baby.

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what happened to the man that got shot.... He died.. 3 secs after

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What did one volcano say to the other? Nothing. Volcanoes are inanimate objects that do not possess the ability to speak.

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why did the black guy buy magnum condoms? because his white friend knew the cashier and thought it would be awkward for himself to buy them.

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theres no 'I' in 'team' but theres an 'I' in 'hitler'

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So he wouldn't become rotisserie with a side of hash brown.

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Don't count your eggs before you put them in a basket.

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A man walks into a bar... He has a severe drinking problem, and his wife weeps for him

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9

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You mom is to dumb when she herd about Walgreens she thout all the walls were green

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What's difficult and tedious to do? Trying to find a joke with 0 thumbs up/down -Sykes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops