Don't tease the fat kids. They have enough on their plates.

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Why Is Six Afraid of Seven? because he is black.

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When is a door not a door? When your house burns down.

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Q: How do you know a chinese guy robbed your house? A: your homework is done, your computer is updated, and 2 hours later he is still trying to back out of your driveway

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse answers, "Because I'm an alcoholic."

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roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweet and grass is green due to the fact that there is chlorophyll in it.

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Why can't Vampires go out in the sunlight? Because they don't exist.

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Roses are red, Violets are dead, I've climbed through your window, I'm under your bed.

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What did one rock say to the other rock? Nothing. Rocks can't talk, idiot.

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Why did Sally have a headache? She had a Brian tumor the size of an eggplant.

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Jack and jill went up a hill to get some water. Jack fell down, twisted his ankle, and continued to roll. He broke his spine and collar bone and he was later taken to the hospital. Later that night he died because the doctors couldn't do anything. Jill then killed herself in mourning.

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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Q:What's colorful and waves like a flag? A: A flag.

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What's worse than getting raped by a bear? Getting raped by two bears.

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Yo mama is so short, she has trouble reaching the top shelf.

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Whats the best day of the week? Sponge

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Roses are Red grass is greener every time i think of you i touch my weiner

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Do you know the difference between a dinosaur and a slice of bread? No. You're pretty stupid then.

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Nah really, I start giggling like a dork whenever weird porn or whatever shows up on my computer, its just too weird. Fine ill use my glasses then, thanks for the comment by the way, I was really regretful for sending you that pic, but then again I did not have contacts then, nor did I want to photoshop anything.

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Why did the jewish family move? Their house burnt down. They lost everything and was tragic

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What do you call a black man playing golf? A golfer.

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Why was the little girl crying. Her dad wiped his bloody penis with her teddybear.

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Why did the man kill his friend? How am I supposed to know

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Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by two giant black scorpions.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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