Whats big, red and will cause severe injuries possibly fatalities if it falls out a tree? A phone box

Arrow in the Knee!

What did the man say ti the other man? Hi

What does a black guy get for Christmas? Everything you own

W. If I was one thing other then a person why would I be? M. The sun. W. Aww, so I brighten your day? M. No, you're just hard to look at.

Not lying Red, I have my contacts, I am a "facilitator", I pull strings for my employers, and sure the FBI has me on their files, after all we have cooperated with them. Not because I wanted to, but because its my job, and it helps me use the best of my abilities and limited education (I am technically an educated lawyer, and not an agent).

Yo momma so fat she saw a yellow bus full of white kids and said, "STOP THAT TWINKIE!!"

Q: How do you make a plumber sad? A: Kill his family

If you're American when you go into the bathroom , and you're American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom. Ha, joke is on you because Americans don't pee.

AIDS is not a lifestyle it's a choice - and you chose wrong.

Nero, I mean it, I want you and your wife to have 15 million dollars, it wont buy you the happiness you seek, but it helps no?

Why did the small 12 year old run away which a chicken. He felt like it and he was carrying bread which the chicken was allergic to.

why did the pancake eat a spanish holiday? Because a plane crashed into his condominium

A man walks into a bar. His crippling alcoholism is tearing his family apart.

If you die laughting, How are you telling this to me?

Yo mama so fat, that she's even bigger than the universe!

FAMOUS DUDE:SWAG! Thank you, thank yo- HEY NO FLASH PHOTOGRAPHY, NO YOU CANT HAVE MY-KABOOM AUDIENCE: . . . YAY CLAP CLAP CLAP.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic and i am too

Q: What does the fox say? A: Nothing. Foxes cannot talk.

Nero7 How are you doing? This is "Eliza" I hope I will be joining, but I cannot reach you by phone, please respond ASAP time is running out.

There once was this guy and he fell down

Jax vs Pig Jax: HOHAHOHOHAHOHAHOHA... Etc Pig *spinning head like neck is gonna break off* Shao Kahn: FINISH HIM! Jax: GOT YA! OH YEAH... BEASTIALI*Y, BEAST*ALITY? AGAIN?

When did the ball-room finally close? Closing time.

What's funnier than 24? Nothing, 24 is just a number. There's is nothing humorous about it. Go away.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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