Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't, she's a woman.

I walked in ony my daughter masturbating. The whole ordeal was very uncomfortable, but I sat her down at the dining table to discreetly explain the necessity of locking doors.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eye deer

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

Maths.

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Dinosaurs are extinct.

what happens when u fall down the stairs? you break your arm.

If bananas are purple, then what color are oranges? I am not going to tell you the answer because this joke has no significance whatsoever.

FORTY SECONDS!!!!!!

Your mother is so white that when she dances, she is off beat a little bit.

I hate long jokes -_-

Why did the donkey cross the road? To get to your house. Knock Knock. Who's there? Heehaw!

What dinosaur makes honey? The Bee Rex.

why is caleb mears sucha perv? becasuee its calebbbb ahahahahahahah

A black man takes a girl home from a nightclub. She says "Show me it's true what they say about black men". So he reveals a big penis and they have sex there and then.

What did the black man do when he saw a bike sitting on the sidewalk? He took it into the shop paid for it and rode off feeling good about how hes helping the environment.

Why did the sloth cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

Why do black people have white hands? Palms and soles are not in direct sunlight, and therefore less amounts of melanin are produced in those regions.

what is 2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2-2+2x0 20

Why doesn't Andy wanna bend over to puck something up? That's how he got assraped!

How many dead babies can you fit in a child's swimming pool? 9 (Trust me, you won't be able to squeeze the tenth one in there.)

How do you find out a chinese's name? Ask him/her

Yo momma's so old, she lives in a nursing home and is on various medications that she needs to take to stay in optimum health.

A whole 'nother.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...