What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

thumb_up thumb_down -2

So there were two palm trees on an island. The first palm tree says to the second, "Hey! What's up?" The second one replies, "Nothing much, just chilling." Except they were actually ice cubes.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

shook hands with Marty ,talked about politics, then walked away.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the city on the other side. He hoped he could find work in one of the city's cheap factories. He needed money for his family: he could not bear to see them slowly starve for any longer. If he could get a lowly-paid job he may be able to just sustain them. But he knew it could not last for long. He would probably die on the streets or in the slums, cold, lonely and starving. But it was a risk worth taking - he could not see his own family waste slowly away like so many of his friends had.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Knock knock, Whos there Nig.ger Nig.ger who Fu.ck all nig.gers.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what does nike and the kkk have in common? Nothing as one is a brand of clothing ie;shoes, hoodies, etc. while the other is a racist cult formed in the 19th century which persecuted african americans.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Q: What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A: A pharmacist

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Q:Why did the dog jump over the fence A:Because he could

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What Do you Call Cheese that's not yours (nacho cheese?) *interrupt them violently and stare with crazy eyes!* STOLEN! I was gonna make quesadillas, now no quesadillas for anyone!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Q. Why hasn't LeBron won a ring? A. Throughout his career, he has been placed with incapable teammates, thus leading to unsuccessful results. However, recently, he has been placed with individuals valid pod achieving such a goal.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the abortion clinic serve at the cafeteria? Fetus soup

thumb_up thumb_down -28

A man sees a hitchhiker on a road. The man crashes because he was not watching the road.

thumb_up thumb_down -62

What did the guard say to the... I was going to finish this anti-joke but I took an arrow to the knee.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Why was the orphan crying? Because his parents are dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Man 1: youre going to die Man 2: why? Man 1: everyone dies

thumb_up thumb_down +35

where did the black person go poop ? in the toilet!

thumb_up thumb_down +33

I like boys!!!!! CC

thumb_up thumb_down +33

How do you kill a blonde? well there are several way's in which to kill another human being, infact, the point that she is blonde is rather irrelevant.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream cone? He was hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What's worse than people repeating a joke about a handicapped child and voting down original, funny, anti-material? Knowing that millions of cubic decimetres of precious air and thousands of tonnes of food are being wasted every day to sustain them...

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why couldn't the kid go into the pirate movie? Because it was rated PG-13 and he was only 11!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the girl fall off the swings? She didn't have arms

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What is the speed limit in front of Liberace's house? 40mph because that portion of the road is curved.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops