A man wearing dark sunglasses walks into a convenience store with a dog on a leash. He goes to the middle of the store, and he starts swinging the dog around over his head by the leash. The store clerk comes over and asks, "what are you doing?" The man replies, "Ajiohskdcojqpowuskncvlkzb" Not knowing what else to do, the clerk calls 911. It turns out the man's name is Ruprict, and he has escaped from the local mental institution. A police officer shortly arrives to bring Ruprict back to the hospital.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He is seriously pissed off about being repeatedly subjected to this level of intense interrogation. Do you ask other animals why they chase their tails or claw at dirt? Do people ask you why you run when you're late? How would you like to have every move you made transformed into some cliche, old farce? There's a road, he's a chicken, there are only so many possible outcomes.

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What did the cat say to the bird? Nothing. It's a cat.

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what do you do when you see a injured black man screaming in pain rolling on the ground assist him or call 911 depending how severe the injury is

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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Teachers be like "Hold on class, I am almost done with my lesson!" Students: " Aint nobody got time 4 dat!"

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Whats the difference between me and a ghost? What? Ghost are not dolphins

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yo momma so fat, Bob's furniture store is having a sale on wednesday at 5:00.

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Why is a dog smarter than a human? Because you an asshole if you believe me

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you were observing it, thus changing its quantum state and making it decide to cross.

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Q: What do you call a black pilot. A: A pilot you racist.

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What do you call 17 blondes standing in a row? most certainly not Charles because it seems as though it would be incrediblely unlikley that a girl would be named Charles

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Why should you never push a Mexican off a bike? Because he will file a lawsuit against you in the event of an injury.

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why did the chicken cross the road? He saw his family getting murdered and tried to stop it but got hit in the process

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A man crawled up to a water fountain but fell because he had no legs

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Whats the difference between a Dodo and an Elephant? They're both extinct. Excluding the elephant

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Why did the black man get some Kool-Aid? Because he was thirsty, and thought Kool-Aid would be able to quench his thirst.

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff

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Man 1: my wife has lovley perfume. She smells like a peppermint cream. Man 2: Yeah, I know, I spent eight hours shagging her last night.

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What did Billy say to Jesus when he died? Nothing he went to hell. -Austin Conradt

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This man was known to beat his wife alot, To the car door to open it for her...

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why do you park in the driveway and drive on the park way

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Caolan and Eamon

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To meet his friend the horse at a bar

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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