I used to be an adventurer like you, then I took an arrow to the knee and had armor so it deflected off. Then I found out my wife was pregnant.

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Why do black guys have big dicks? God felt bad putting pubes on their head

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what would abraham lincoln do if he were alive today? scream and try to open his coffin.

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All these jokes are so much funnier when I read them during class, laughing my ass off and everybody's looking at me like I'm retarded

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FAMOUS DUDE:SWAG! Thank you, thank yo- HEY NO FLASH PHOTOGRAPHY, NO YOU CANT HAVE MY-KABOOM AUDIENCE: . . . YAY CLAP CLAP CLAP.

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What did Ed Gein get at McDonalds? The corpse of a worker he killed by the dumpster and hauled back to his shack to hang up and gut like a deer.

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Why was the man so angry? Because the woman was not in the kitchen

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You know what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Because you touch yourself.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm an expert on flowers.

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Q: Why is Abu Soooo Dank? A: Because he scores too many left-foot bangers

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How many immature teenagers does it take to screw in a light bulb? Your Mum.

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Alright alright... But you gotta promise to call me then

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what do you call a black guy falling down a hill? A hiker with an inconveniance you racist son of a bitch

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What is 9+10? 19

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A black man and a midget walk into a bar. They notice the beverages are unreasonably priced so they leave.

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Yo momma so ugly she looks out the window and got arrested for mooning.

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One kid says I've had threw bottles of water and I haven't had to go to the bathroom. His friend says may have a urinary tract infection.

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What's the differece between a rock and a black guy? A rock can't eat fried chicken.

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Shut up, I already got that before you said it, typed it, whatever I do not give a fuck, I want the last word because, reasons of millions. I love you Nero come visit me sometime, wait ill come visit you, yes yes, but now shut up, I want the last word, because I made myself your bitch! You know its not what I mean the other way but then around again, I think, you are my I made myself your bitch, no wait, keep reading, you are, my bitch master..., pretty please let me have the last word? Never fucking mind! Have the last word, I surrender, I totally surrender I want my nose back XD.

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar. Steven Hawking is disabled from the neck down. I lied.

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Don't quote me on this Nero, but she kinda deserves it, she should know better, its not like you have gotten this far by not knowing your limits, even if you tend to break them way too often. Can you get rid of the hallucinations with your mind alone? If not get to sleep asap! And stay asleep for a month or so, and if they somehow cant feed your system intravenously, they can all get the fuck out of there.

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Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? He's dead.

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whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Gingers

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What do you call a woman on a bike? A dike

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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