If life gives you lemons, You have a problem and you might need medicine.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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If you have 12 apples and I have 12 ice cubes how many pancakes fit on a roof? Purple because aliens don't wear hats.

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Why couldn't the hobo buy any clothes? They did not have his size available.

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What's the difference between a black person and a pizza? Pizza is a type of food.

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Have you seen the new Spiderman movie yet? No, Uncle ben hasn't seen it either.

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Why did the cat eat his food? Because he was hungry.

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penis

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Whats the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies? You can't unload one with a pitchfork

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What is black and blue and red all over? A woman that just learned a valuable lesson.

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roses are red violets are blue i have 5 fingers the middle ones for you.

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*see an orphan* Knock knock Whos there Not you parents ...

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Pickles are moist.

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i keep getting thumbs down...

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Knock Knock Who's there? ........

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awkies when u see danni white fingering jacob :0;0;0;0, and jamie fingering himself..............

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A: Why are black people so good at sports? B: Practice and determination.

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Why did the monkey fall out the tree? Cause its dead!

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A gay man named pat played on a gay website with a child named Charlie

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What do you call a gay man having sex with a woman? Sex.

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whats the difference between a boyscout and a jew? boyscouts come home from camp

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What do u call a gay dinosaur Tyran a sore arse

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What do you call a bunch of Cubans on a boat in the Gulf of Mexico? A guy who just so happens to own a boat and is on a fishing trip with his buddies. -Mitch Hastings

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one of my friends died of heartburn today :( i cant believe gav is gone

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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