What's the thing that freaks guys out the most? When you're about to have sex with a girl and it turns out she had a penis and it's bigger than yours

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what do you call 100 muslims on a plane? Passengers

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Q) What do you call a black man swinging from a tree? A) A very silly man as it is potentially dangerous

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What did the farmer say to the duck? I don't know, but the duck doesn't give a f.....

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what do all black jokes start with (look left look right)

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Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium BATMAN! Oh cemetery jokes

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I told a priest that I would never believe in anything greater than myself. He said I had the God complex, that I was grandios. I stared him in the eye and asked, "how highly do you think of me? Thank you" and left.

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Why didn't the new baseball cap fit little Tommy? Because Tommy was decapitated

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Jack be nimble. Jack be quick. But Jack still couldn't out run that bullet.

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Why did the monk shave his head? So he's more aerodynamic.

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What happened to the Chicken who crossed the road? It made it to the other side!

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The war against the moral men was long and hard, yet the Victor stands, the most dark of metals. Nero Metal, enjoy 2016 as much as you can enjoy both hellfire and the wrath of heaven against you, as there will be years no more for mankind to Count, trust not my Words, but the visions in Your head, and if you doubt Your sanity, know that by september the 13th, you will not be the only one. The end of the children of God is upon you, as you took his, he shall take Yours, eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth... Rest well... ...While you still can`t

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Why from a friends phone? I demand a full explanation, here, you got my number, you got my home address, and who the hell was that crying little bitch on the phone? I got friends in the UK which owe me some money, and nothing to lose, if I have to take care of you before you take care of me and even possibly my wife in the crossfire, I will take you down and everything in my path! Moral: Got ya!.

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Why was the Indian at the casino? He had a gambling addiction.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Doesn't matter. He was hit by a semi truck.

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What time is it? 2:47 PM.

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Q: Why did the guy fall off his bike? A: He got shot!

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roses are blue violets are red... i have to use the bathroom

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what does the monster eat after going to the dentist? the dentist

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why did the girl slap joe? he had a boner.

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how do u get the baby to stop choking? take ur dick out of its mouth!!!

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If a chicken and a half lays an egg and half in a half of a day how long does it take a monkey with a peg leg to kick the seeds out of a dill pickle?

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all these jokes are horrible now

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Most likely for no discernible reason as chickens are animals with poor reasoning skills.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops