Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

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Q.If I have four apples and billy has 4 oranges, how many pancakes will fit on the roof. A. 3 because aliens like purple hats.

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Hello! I am Harry Potter, and i will be teaching you pottery today! Yes, call me Mr. Pottery!

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Q: What did the police officer tell the man without a shirt on? A: Put a shirt on.

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Why did the asain fail his tests? They weren't math tests...

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I got 99 problems, and most of them involve my terminal illness.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, a car ran him over.

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Why was the boy so tired? He had to carry his moms dead body up the stairs.

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There were three men walking across the road and it started to rain

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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I pregnant woman wakes in the night because she had a mis-carriage.

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What's green and invisible? This cabbage in my hand.

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What do elves get for Christmas? Overtime.

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What's brown and smells like paint? -Poop. I don't know why it smells like paint though..

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What did the cow say to the butcher? At least I'm not a Jew.

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What's harder than breaking up with your girlfriend? A stone.

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how do you get expelled? Rape a special ed kid.

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what do u call a turtle with no shell? Larry

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Who's the fastest kid in AA

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What's worse than a teacher yelling at you? The holocaust

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what tall and looks like a jew?

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Doctor Doctor! I think im turning into a carrot! Thats a side effect of the drugs Alice, We've just had your test results back. I'm sorry Alice, You've got HIV.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? Neither has he.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops