What does a baby and a bowling ball share in common? They both displace a similar amount of water.

What did the Apostle John say to Jesus of Nazareth? "Oh, blow it out your butthole."

Why did Sally fly off the swing, She had no arms Knock knock *Who's there* Not Sally

How can you tell if a duck is behind you? Turn around

Whats the sad thing about 4 black guys going over a cliff in a car? It was my car!

Why couldn't the bartender sell alcoholic beverages? He got fired

How do you know if an elephant has been in your fridge? If it is laying in pieces around the crumbled wreckage of your house. [L]

''I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.''

THe Election

What's worse than 6 dead babies in a trash can? More than 6.

What is white and flies upwards? A retarded Snowflake.

YOLO

What is black and white and red all over? A road killed zebra.

A seal walks into a club, It proceeds to maul customers and then makes its way back to the ocean where it lives.

Want to hear the funniest joke in the world? I forget how it goes but it ends with the abolishment of slavery.

What did the kid with cancer get for christmas. Nothing. He was Jewish.

What does two plus two equal? 4

I like my sex how i like my steak Pink and Bloody

Your Mom

How does a Chinese person wear a contact lens? On a 45 degree angle

How do you make a baby stop crying for the rest of its life? Shoot it in the face.

Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

Stevie Wonders said to his friend, "Have you seen my house?" "No" "Neither have I"

why would a man mistake a watermelon for AK-47? i dont know. The man probably has mental issues.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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