Why was 7 afraid of 8? Because 8-9-10.

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Is your refrigerator running? If so, you are on drugs, and should see help.

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What did lil' Suzy do when she got home from school? She was violently mutilated by a bear then continually but raped by a man she met on the Internet. Needless to say, she had a great time. -Harrison

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What do you call a panda without a head? Dead.

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Why did the welshman cross the road? To violently hump sheep.

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Q: Did you hear about the fire at the circus? A: It was in tents!

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Q: What did the crippled deaf kid get for Christmas? A: A motorised wheelchair and a cochlear implant. Good for him.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar, he doesn't let a minor disablity distract him from having a good time.

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Sugar is sweet. Plums are too. Prison rape isn't funny either.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Where is the bathroom, I need to go poo.

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Your mamas so old. When she farted dust came out.

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Why was the clown in red shoes wearing skis? Because he likes to ski in red shoes, and he's a clown

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Why did the young boy cross the road? because his dad beats him due to alcoholism and his mother is a crack whore.

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Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

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How do you make Justin Bieber cry? You take away his marijuana.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am Jack Bauer, Where is the nuke?

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knock knock whos there banana banana who knock knock whos there orange orange who orange you glad I didn't say banana

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? I'm a talking banana; what more do you want from me?

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On a scale of 1 to Kevin James, how much do you exercise?

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What did the boy get from his grandmother on Christmas. Nothing she died on Thanksgiving.

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This night was a stormy one, alot was destroyed, but the spirit of Little Jonny Harrison lived on with a shining light so strong it could blind some. Jonny lived in Ristoville, a village atop a hill. Citizens of Ristoville were frightened for their lives, all but Jonny. He was bullied from a young age of 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest, full-time. Fear shined in the eyes of the normal residents, whilst, in Jonny's heart, there glowed a glow of pure hope and confidence, Jonny Harrison, was going into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? He pondered this, and ultimately came to the conclusion that there will be nothing worse out there than Uncle Clive's "Magical Basement of Happiness". Jonny sat his mother down, looked her in the eye and whispered farewell. He wished his father the best wishes possible. Finally, Rosie Harrison, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who had been addicted to Crystal Meth for about 25 years now and been through 13 interventions and countless failed suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonathon's speech, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her fragile little ears as Jonny walked away. He took with him a couple cartons of Ribena and his lucky medal and took his first step outside. He took out a carton of Ribena, strongly crumpled it up, slightly spraying fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and shouted, "Nothing will stop me!". Jonny died shortly after of AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 5 years in a high security prison for child molestation and consistant child abuse and paedophillia. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Boo Boo who? I don't have a last name, it's just Boo

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why did the chicken cross the road it didn't it got hit y a car

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Steven. Steven who? Steven your neighbor, may I please come in?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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