what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? a bike

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who do you call those who give this joke a thumbs down? people

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What happens when a chicken with a goat have sex? nothing.

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Where do you find a quadriplegic? Where you left him

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TOYS TOYS TOYS IN THE ATTIC

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How do you scare a little boy? You tell him everyone he loves was shot to death by you and then kick his guardian .

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I met this girl and we really got along, then one night she tied me up, I thought she was getting kinky...then she ripped my face off....

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BTMG JOAN!"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TOP OF THE MORNING FREE MEAT NO SANTA THIS YEAR BONE FOUNDATIONS MOUNTNORRIS WHY IS THAT BAG MOVING?????????? MR MO MOLESTOR S H I T STAINS VEGETABLE GUN OPERATION SBB OPERATION SBB (THE AFTERMATH) #SL #NSL TIN SCHACK SKI LIFT MILK STAINS NATHAN: 5 - SEATS: 0 GREEK LETTER STU THE SO

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Bob: Oh, there was a big surfing competition in Hawaii. Bill: that's really cool. Bob: yeah, there were huge waves up to 53 feet. Bill: Awesome! Bob: Yeah there was a Japanese guy that won. Bill: Wow, that will bring up the spirits of japan. Bob: Yeah, but he got disqualified. Bill: No, how?!?! Bob: he was surfing on his dresser.

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In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

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Whats the difference between pizza and a Jewish person? Pizza doesnt scream when being put into an oven.

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Why was six afraid of seven? It wasn't. A number is a mathematical object used to count and measure.It is not a living thing and therefore does not possess thoughts and feelings.

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A black man walks into a bar and orders a shot. He then precedes to drink it.

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What do you get when you cross an Indian and a duck? An Indian duck.

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What made Qtip's so dangerous? Q-tip's music

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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Why did Suzy fall of the swing? Cuz she had no arms! B I T C H

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A Jew walks into a bar...He uses his coupon to get a free drink, then leaves.

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Penis chickens

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Two tomatoes where crossing the road, when one of them barely avoided being run over. The other said, come on tomato!

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Why did the middle age man walk across the street? There were no vehicles currently driving on that particular road

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Q: You and a thousand other people are suddenly bursting in flames at a park, there is a big barrel of water just a few steps away from you, what do you do in order to save the people that truly matter? A: Stop drop and roll, duh!

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Some poems rhyme This doesn't.

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Awesome! I've just received my giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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