Why do birds fly South in the winter? Warmer, better food sources and therefore greater chance of survival.

Guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. He orders a beer with two cubes of ice. The bartender ask why does he want two cubes of ice. The guy doesn't answer. He finishes his beer and proceeds to go home safely because he was not intoxicated.

What did the you know what screw this I'm sick of making these stupid jokes there all the same. Hang on hang on What did the pirate do to the dog yes This style of joking is so different I'm going to be a famous comedian oh wait there's a whole bloody website full of these. O look another one and another one and another one that knife over there looks really nice right now

So a blonde, brunete, and red head are all on the side of the road for prostitution. so a man walks up to the red head with money. she takes it and runs off. a man goes up to the bruenete and hands her money, but she also takes it and runs. so a man walks up to the blond with money and she says "wait...we get paid to do this?"

A guy walks into a bar and says, "I'm Japanese". The guy at the counter says "What a coincidence! I am Japanese too." He gets seated and the guy next to him says, "I'm Japanese too." The bar is in Japan.

Your chicken just went across the road. What does this tell you about the economy?

A woman is terminally ill in the hospital and her family is trying to decide what her last meal should be. Her older sister suggests tea and the idea is accepted enthusiastically. The other sister suggests making jasmin tea and the ill woman's son also suggests toast. The woman's husband looks down at the orange he had just peeled for his wife and looks up at the rest of them. moments later he shoots the three of them and then himself. All were found dead. http://www.dispatch.com/content/stories/local/2012/01/11/food-tiff-ends-in-deaths.html

You're Like A Book I Want To Put You Down

Major League Soccer

Gay jokes aren't funny Cum on guys

Q: a man in a camry runs over his wife. who's fault is it? A: toyota and their breaks.

Why did little Suzie spill her drink? Since birth she has lacked a jaw

what is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a cadilac. a cadilac is something i want

Did you hear about the kid from Oklahoma? Yeah, he died.

What happened to the orphan when it walked to the park? He found his birth parents........but then they were killed by a crazy hobo and he was taken away and molested

Why did the chicken die? Because it was crossing a busy road.

A blonde fails an exam because she did not study

Have you see stevie wonders house? No. Neither has he.

Why was Susie's mom crying? Because Susie got hit by a bus

Gas prices are so high, I've had to resort to walking and riding my bike.

How do you make a sandwich out of clay? Shape it like a sandwich

So a plane flies into a world trade centre... That's not funny

Two fish we're in a tank.. Yup.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? 3, according to Mr. Owl

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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