whats worse than find a worm in your apple? finding the holocaust in your apple.

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Your momma's so old, she your family should be proud to know someone who has lived such a long and full life.

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Did you hear phonsi was Gay? I just found out too, he walked into the diner and said, "ive got AAIIIIIDS."

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why did the chicken cross the road? to touch the goats beard

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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patty was in sunday school, the teacher asked her "patty who created the universe?" john sliped into the seat next to her and jabbed her with a pen "LORD ALMIGHTY" the teacher said' good patty now who gave himself for us? john again jabbed her with a pin "JESUS CHRIST" "that very good patty now what did mary say to joseph after they had their 23 child?" john jabbed her " IF YOU STICK THAT DAMN THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME ILL BREAK IT IN HALF!!!" the teacher fainted

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I am tying up hostages. - Ethan R. 2015

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Nigel Farrage and the concept of UKIP.

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Why did the guy die. He OD on drugs

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If life gives you melons, you have dyslexia.

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It's not just a boulder. It's a rock! A rooooocckk!

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What's brown and sticky??? A brown stick

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Q: Why did the boy fall off his bicycle? A: Because someone threw a fridge at him.

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Whats funnier than a massacre? Everything.

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why did the irishman leave the bar he had to go to his sons birthday party

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What happens if you fall of a cliff You die

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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What did the kid say to the ice-cream Man Can I have a duck please

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Why didn't Jesus like Pizza? Because Pizza doesn't exist.

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Why did Billy drop his ice cream? The Holocaust.

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Knock, knock. Now before I asked "Who's there" I first opened the door as then I can see who's there without having to ask them through the door.

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Why was the boy crying? Because he got hit by a bus. Why did he get hit by a bus? Because his mom was laughing. Why was his mom laughing? Because she was driving the bus. Why was she driving the bus? Because the boy fell off a swing. Why did he fall off a swing? Because he didn't have any arms. Why didn't he have any arms? Because his diabetic monkey had the flu. Why did his diabetic monkey have the flu? Because the boy was crying.

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Why did the black man have sex with the white woman? Because they were married.

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Why did the Mexicans climb the fence? When they were tossing frisbee and accidentally tossed it into their neighbors yard and they had to go get it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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