What do two Mexicans call a stray cat? Gato

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Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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If youve ever seen the wizard of oz movie and family guy, then u get what i mean. Hes a PHONY! a BIG FAT PHONY!

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A guy walks in to a bar and says to the bartender "I'm fed up with all these 'guy walks into a bar' jokes on anti-joke. The bartender says "I have no idea what you're talking about".

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poems, Show me your tits.

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Q: what's green and has wheels? A: a john deere tractor

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Stop procrastinating.

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What did the golfer do on his vacation? He played golf.

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Q: What were little Jonathon's grandmas last words before dying of Alzheimer's? A: Who are you?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay guys house Knock Knock Who's there? The chicken

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Whats worse than being fat? Being Rebecca Black

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A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch"

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What's big, purple, and smells like children? Barney

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how many licks does it take to get to the center of lollipop? unknown.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It's really irrelevant when you realize this joke is about a suicidal chicken...

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What's the cure of cancer? Death.

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Yo mamma is so skinny, she has developed anorexia, a serious eating disorder, which not only affects her, but also the ones that she loves and cares about.

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ms caissie is secretly laughing at these...

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Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Orange is orange

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What's the difference between a duck?

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Whats worse than a truck full of dead babies? A live baby trying to eat his way out.

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Why do ducks fly south for the winter? because its to far to waddle

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Teacher: Pop quiz time class. Sally, what year did we first land on the moon? Sally: It was 1969. Teacher: That is correct. Larry, who killed JFK? Larry: What? I didn't do it, I wasn't even born yet! Teacher: Just answer the question Larry: But sir, I swear I would never do that. You have to believe me. Teacher: Larry, you're an idiot

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops