Whats alive and drowning? your new born baby you just threw in the river

Your momma so fat.... She's at risk of cardiovascular disease. You should take her to a nutritionist.

Why didn't Suzie answer her mother? Suzie has a serious condition where she is mute and also severely deaf.

A white, black, jewish, and hispanic person apply for a job as an accountant who gets the job? One of them.

Why did little Katie fall off her bike? Because the postman killed the bee hive.

Why was the young girl sad? A doctor told her that due to the fact that she was recently raped, she contracted AIDS.

A black guy walks into a bar. He drinks some wine and exits the bar. -Lets Go Mets, not Yankees

Why was the boy crying on his birthday? He was being molested by his birthday clown who he was fully aware was his alcoholic costumed father.... And it wasn't his birthday.

What is the difference between a white gut and a black guy? The level of melanin in their skin.

why didnt the old man go to his sons birthday he died.........nah i lied he went went

Yo mama's so fat, that we are all extremely concerned for her health.

Why was the homeless man homeless? He lost his house in a terrible house fire, stretching throughout his apartment building, losing his much beloved wife and kids in the horrific accident.

A priest a rapist and a child molester walk into a bar. He orders a drink

Why did the monkey fall from the tree? It passed away in its sleep.

Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint.

What do you call a drummer without a girlfriend? Homeless

What did the black kid get for christmas? Probably nothing as the social economy of the black race has been low in 2011 and hasn't raised by a penny in 2012.

How do you confuse a Muslim? - Rub his belly.

What do you call a black man driving a helicopter? Blackhawk down

one of my best friends is blind and hasn't been able to see anything hhis entire life but he can hear a hummingbird from 50 yards away i mean, talk about worthless..

A duck walks into the bar, buys a beer, steals your woman, wins a bar fight, pistol whips a police officer, departs and shouts Aflac

What did Selena Gomez say to JB? We're breaking up cuz u smell like French fries and you look like a poop

What did Emmanuel Frimpong say to George Elokobi? you sir, are DENCH

Why did Susie fell off the swings? Because she didn't have any arms or legs.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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