A man walks into a bar and poops his pants. He left because of the embarrassment.

Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Holy shit! I can talk too!"

What's the mosy hardest game in the world? The Impossible Game.

Why did the teenager crash his car? He had no arms

Why did little Tommy eat an apple? Because he was on a diet

A women frantically calls the doctor and says, " Doctor, doctor, give me the news! I have a bad case of loving you."

Chuck Norris doesn't just have a chin underneath his beard. He also has part of his neck underneath his beard.

What do you call it when a plane crashes into a school? A terrible accident.

homosexual

What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing, fruit can't talk.

Why did everyone want to hang out with the mushroom? They didn't. In fact the mushroom's social anxiety had developed to the stage that he had frequent contemplations of self-harm and is in serious need of extensive therapy.

what do you call your mom? mom

What do a vampire and a ginger have in common they're both afraid of the sunligh- oh wait this anti jokes ohhhhhhh oh well

ProX hacker JazZ Has aids hahahaha

What's taters, precious? The potato is a starchy, tuberous crop from the perennial Solanum tuberosum of the Solanaceae family.

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

Let's get some comments on this one! Everyone add a comment with a quote from a movie! I'll thumbs-up the best comments!

Q. Why did the boy fall off the swing? A. He had no arms or legs. Q. What did he get for Christmas? A. A drumset Q. Knock Knock Who's there Not him

Why was six afraid of seven? Because chad makes babies cry.

There are 2 muffins sitting in an oven. One muffin says "Damn, it's getting hot in here." The other muffing replies "Holy Shit! A Talking Muffin!"

A man walks into a bar, and he died.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? I ASKED YOU FIRST!

Why didn't Clemson accept John Burns' college application? Because John Burns was wanted for five counts of first degree murder.

Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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