I always like to pack a second pair of pants, because if there's one thing my mother ever said to me it was 'please, I'm begging you - don't put me in a home.'

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Excuse me, do you have any gnats? Yes, plenty. Thank you

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Why did the boy fall off his skateboard before running into a cross-section? Because he was shot.

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what do German people eat at BBQ ' s ? burgers and hotdogs and kebabs and fried chicken with a garnish of summer salad washed down with a cold mouth tingling glass of coca cola and jews

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Why didnt the 14 year old get her period? Because she had gotten pregnant by her father

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If a blonde and a feather were dropped off of a building at the same time, which would hit the ground first? A feather is a light object and would most likely float all the way down at a slow velocity, the blonde is most likely 100+ pounds and would die because she is stupid.

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will soon have her institutionalized.

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What did Jesus say when he made the first black person? What another perfect creation to this world!

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DON"T READ THIS!

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Why didn't Hitler go to heaven? He killed millions of jews and was an atheist.

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Make hurtful and upsetting remarks about her person.

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Why was the little boy cold? Cause he was traped In a fridge

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Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

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There's a Mexican and a black guy in a car... Who's driving? The Cop!!!

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What happened to the pig? It got turned into bacon like every other pig.

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how do you make a plumer cry kill his family

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Q. What did little John get from reading this. then wait and you will see that the person who you were asking the question will give you a series of awkward faces until they lose interest

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Why did Hitler kill himslef? He saw his gas bills.

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Why did Sally drop her ice cream cone? Because she had no arms. Knock, Knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

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Doctor, everybody despises me. That cant be totally true you despicable piece of shite!

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue Wait Arent Violets purple?

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Q: What's worse than stepping a LEGO in the middle of the night? A: A landmine

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Why did the pirate have a peg leg? Diabetes

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When does a cat not land on its feet? When it has paws.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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