A seal walks into a club. The man proceeds to skin it and sell the fur for profit.

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Knock Knock Who is there? *bang* The following story depicts the life and death of Bob:___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________then he opened the door and was shot in the face.

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Bitch

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So Nero, seriously, don't be mean, call me, I am going to bed now, nighty nite.

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Yesterday i ate an owl with all the feathers on it

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What's black and white and in the desert? Tourists being held hostage by a tribe.

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Why was the black guy homeless? because he has been affected severely by the credit crunch, been made redundant and had his home repossessed

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chuck noris- can swim through land god- can walk on watter i- can run on air

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PhilosopherCon: "Why?" "Why?" "Why?" "Why?" "Why?" "Why?" "Why?" "Why?" "Why?"

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A man is standing on the street corner waiting for the bus. As it pulls up he steps on and pays his fare while he whistles to his iPod.

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What do we call Osama? Osama

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why did the chicken cross the road? cause kade touches himself at night

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting eaten alive by midgets with down syndrome

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Why was Johnny sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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What is a Will And Dan put together A WillDan HAHAHAHAHA

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What the difference between a ferarri and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a pile of dead babies in my garage. That would be murder.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke 'er face.

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Q. What do you call a Widow's Husband? A. Dead...

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What's funny about a dying dog? Nothing.

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What's worse then an adult dying A baby dying

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How long does it take a person to steal a television? Many variables could determine said ability to successfully steal a television. Such variables depend on sub-variables such as weight of the television, whether the television is a store, an upper-class citizen's home, or in a "ghetto" apartment. A main variable could be the race of the thief in question. African Americans are scientifically more likely to steal a television faster compared to a Caucasian. Yet a downside to being an African American is the fact that they are more likely to be called in for questioning or arrested on the spot at their broken down home. Caucasians are less likely to be questioned and if caught will most likely obtain the proper amount of bribery money in which to pay off the police.

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Q: Why did the dead baby cross the road??? A: It was stapled to the chicken.

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What do Whitney Houston and Selena Gomez have in common? They are both dead. Exept for Selena Gomez..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops