how many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? 2 one to hold the latter and one to put it in

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Q. What do you call a gay bar with no bar stools? A. A gay bar

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Roses are blurred Violets too I have astigmatism I cant see shit

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What did the anti-social man say to a girl Nothing

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The original anti joke. What is jeopardy?

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Q. When's The Best Time To Wear A Striped Sweater? A. All The Time.

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Roses are red Violets are blue And so avatars And so is blue paint

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Yo momma's so stupid she comes up in a lot of jokes titled "yo momma jokes"

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? The horse says my mom died from cancer

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Your mother is so white that when she dances, she is off beat a little bit.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

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What do you get when you cross a taco with a a bungee cord? An inedible taco.

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What do you call a bad joke website? anti joke

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eye deer

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What's worse than a bee sting? A katon.

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how do you make a plumber cry kill his family how do you kill the plumbers family with a wrench

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whats worse than breaking your arm? getting raped by a squirel

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How do you stop a bus from hitting you?? You throw small children to impede the progress of the bus.

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why did the homosexual man cross the road? to get to his gay partner.

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Always do, always will, I have overcome far worse, doctor told my mother when I was born (without a heartbeat) that I was dead, and if they somehow managed to get me breathing again (heart beating etc) I would have suffered so much brain damage that I would not have a concious mind, in other words I would never have been able to learn anything, not to speak nor to type... ...Gotta say I pretty much fucking disagree with the "good" old doctor, and for the record, my heart is as healthy as... Healthy can be I am ambidextrous, but because of this eyedrum mutant thing of mine, I cant tell left from right, because well, to my radar senses both are left and right. Sorry if I am not making much sense here, just bleed a bit out of my nose, had it been from my ears, things could have gotten ugly, but no, its all good.

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Wilson: would you buy lottery when you grow up Mattuew: no theres no point Wilson: ask Xiangxi right next to you Mattuew: xiangxi, would you buy lottery if you grow up? Xiangxi: Prabably not, because the chance of winning a lottery is lower than becoming an astronaut Mattuew: the probability of you winning the lottery is higher than you finding a girlfriend

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Hey babe, do you like video games, movies, mystery books, philosophy, walking in the park, going to the gym, riding bicycles, traveling around the world, and meeting new people? Because I like video games, movies, mystery books, philosophy, walking in the park, going to the gym, riding bicycles, traveling around the world, and meeting new people.

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What did the bus say to the short bus? Heh, you're retarded..

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Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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