Why did Sally have a headache? She had a Brian tumor the size of an eggplant.

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A man drove up to a drive-thru. He ordered a coke, but the lady at the window spilled it on his lap. He promptly changed his clothes and accepted the lady's apology.

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What did the man with cancer say when he got hit in the face with a crowbar? "Ow."

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Why did two girls need one cup? they didnt feel like washing an extra dish to drink their coca cola

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A Mexican walks into Taco Bell, because it is the only restaurant within walking distance of his workplace.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

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A black man is setting up contingency measures of protection in his personal place of residence when all of a sudden, several warning alarms sound and a few specialized people with red "combating" devices who were alerted by the blatant scenerio unfolding before them were moving quickly in order to match previously stipulated criteria of value. The black man and his family were partaking in a monthly fire drill unfolding in their own house since they were extremely responsible, law-abiding citizens of the city they were located in that required various kinds ofl saftey precautions to be taken so to mitigate the serious chance that people might be hurt by preventable, residential distasters.

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What did the grizzly bears have for lunch? Fish and tourists.

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Two hippies walk into a bar. They are both asked to leave because they are in violation of the 'no shoes, no service' policy.

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cccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccorn

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what's white and sticky semen

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin that just got shot

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You wanna know what's out of this world? The moon

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Why did the parents order the 16 year old daughter to move out of Virginia? Because she lost her virginity

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What is the difference between a brick and a ginger? The entirety of their chemical make up and physical appearance.

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What's bad about being a ghost with no arms or legs? You're dead.

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Me: f*** off Asshole: YOU'RE MOM! Me: -is dead.

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Why couldn't Billy the bird fly? He was an ostrich, ostriches can't fly.

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Find x X + 2 = 5 ^ I found it

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I went out for a nice evening with my wife last week, and we kept getting dirty looks because I'm 42 and she's 19. I get that people are a little weird about that for whatever stupid reason, but it totally ruined our tenth anniversary.

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why did the baseball player strike out? he forgot the bat

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A horse walks in to a bar. The barman says: "Why the long face?" The horse does not reply because it is a horse and can neither speak nor understand English. The horse is startled by it's surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables on it's way out.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who gives a crap?

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Two Jews are sitting in a large oven. They realize it is a dangerous place to be and get out of the oven.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops