Whats the worst thing about dying? Your not alive anymore.

Where is boots, Dora asks Why the hell are you asking me when your the one who is with him.

A black man walks into a bar and a white man says "we don't allow coloured men in here". the black man sighs and walks out, wondering what he ever did wrong, and makes his way to the liqour store, to buy some beer to drown his sorrows over his mothers death. On the way, a racist white man shoots and kills him. Then, at his funeral, someone makes the joke "Wow, how ironic. The black guy was the victim.."

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Whats the difference between a white man and a black man? black people have more melanin in their skin causing it to pigment and turn black

whats yellow and very big? I dont know. no one will tell me

What did Stephen Hawking say to a prostitute? Push me, and then just touch me, Till I can get my, Satisfaction.

A mountain goat walks into a bar, the bar mans asks ''so, what will it be?''. The other customers question the mental integrity of the bar man, as goats cannot talk.

Steve Jobs is alive.

Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

Who's the best German Chef? Hitler

What did the one battery say to the other? Nothing. Batteries can't talk.

A black man, a jew and a muslim walk into a bar. ... I forgot what happens next, so let's just say they have a good time and get back home safely.

"Lassie, Lassie, come quick! Timmy is in the well!" "I'm a dog," replies Lassie. "You folks have ropes, ladders, and opposable thumbs. What the hell could I possibly do to help?" With that final act of disobedience, Lassie was turned into fertilizer.

What's worse than getting raped by a bear? Getting raped by two bears.

Rick Ross is so fat, that he is fatter than someone who isn't as fat as he is.

How many pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbuld? Likely the same number as is required when people of non-polish descent screw in lightbulds. Overall however it is variable based on the number or bulbs, position of bulbs in relation to ceiling, potential shakiness of required ladder, and desired efficiency. Please reference GE's lightbuld home instillation handbook for further information or alternately contact your local electrician or handy neighbor.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven hundred and eighty nine.

Why did the male propagate the female? Because he was drugged. Slyly, this foxy female had slipped the male the date rape drug and a dangerous amount of viagra. During intercourse, the male ripped a gaping hole in the female's stomach and killed her. He woke up confused inside a dead stinking corpse.

im a policeman the car infront of me had a foot hanging out of the trunk. i pulled him over. i closed the trunk and proceeded to inform him of the dangers of open trunks.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English.It is confused by it's surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

How do you get a blonde to stop talking? Hit her in the head with a brick.

Whats worse than anal sex Anal sex with razor blades

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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