A man told his daughter not to give his dog coffee. His daughter turned and told him that she was his nurse and his alzheimers is getting worse.

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Q:Why are all of the vampires extinct? A:AIDS is a serious disease. You shouldn't joke about it.

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what do you call a bird that is gay bird a gaybird

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A young boy is concerned about the well- being of his father, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

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Knock knock Who's There? Woo? Woo who? Stop celebrating and let me in.

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Parents were talking about a particular whore house and tries to keep it secret to their son. Father: Bob and I saw the house near the river, its a whore house full of prostitutes. Mother: Shhh! Our son is listening. The Son enters the room. Son: Don't mind me, I know that area. Both parents were angry: So you've been there!? Don't deny, you know! Son: Just because I know doesn't mean I've been there. I know the moon has less gravity but I haven't been there.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "Why the long face?" And the horse says "I have cancer".

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Where do cows go on the weekends? The slaughterhouse.

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CALLER: Is your refrigerator running? OWNER: Yes, it's working just fine.

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Your mother is so fat that she has to undergo amputation of her foot because of type 2 diabetes.

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Why did Paul let Johnny choke to death? Because Paul had no arms.

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Whatever their names happen to be.

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If the blue man lives in the blue house, and the yellow man lives in the yellow house, who lives in the white house? The blue man. He has made a good living with a high salary and has enough money to afford two houses.

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I haven't left my basement in 29 years

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If you give a mouse a cookie... ...you're destroying its natural diet. It might die.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To try and get hit by a car.

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Knock Knock Whos there Cameron oh

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why couldn't the boy talk? Because he was dead

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What did the one battery say to the other? Nothing. Batteries can't talk.

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Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

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Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

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Who's the best German Chef? Hitler

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Steve Jobs is alive.

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What do you call most people over 50 who aren't married. Divorced

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops