how come timmy didnt brush his teeth he didnt have a toothbrush

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the the chicken cross the road? So he wouldn't be late for his annual check up at the clinic across the street.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Have you ever seen the movie called "The Tourist"? No

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's redder than a red apple? 2 red apples

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Q)Why doesn't the blond have a job? A) he is 12

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Whats the worst thing about dying? Your not alive anymore.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A black man walks into a bar and a white man says "we don't allow coloured men in here". the black man sighs and walks out, wondering what he ever did wrong, and makes his way to the liqour store, to buy some beer to drown his sorrows over his mothers death. On the way, a racist white man shoots and kills him. Then, at his funeral, someone makes the joke "Wow, how ironic. The black guy was the victim.."

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Whats the difference between a white man and a black man? black people have more melanin in their skin causing it to pigment and turn black

thumb_up thumb_down +22

whats yellow and very big? I dont know. no one will tell me

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What did Stephen Hawking say to a prostitute? Push me, and then just touch me, Till I can get my, Satisfaction.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Where is boots, Dora asks Why the hell are you asking me when your the one who is with him.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A man walks into a bar, he realizes he has no money and leaves

thumb_up thumb_down +22

http://www.com/

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A mountain goat walks into a bar, the bar mans asks ''so, what will it be?''. The other customers question the mental integrity of the bar man, as goats cannot talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's worse than tornadoes in the USA? Earthquakes in Japan.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 cantaloupe.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's worse than getting raped by a bear? Getting raped by two bears.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A black man, a jew and a muslim walk into a bar. ... I forgot what happens next, so let's just say they have a good time and get back home safely.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

"Lassie, Lassie, come quick! Timmy is in the well!" "I'm a dog," replies Lassie. "You folks have ropes, ladders, and opposable thumbs. What the hell could I possibly do to help?" With that final act of disobedience, Lassie was turned into fertilizer.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

im a policeman the car infront of me had a foot hanging out of the trunk. i pulled him over. i closed the trunk and proceeded to inform him of the dangers of open trunks.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the male propagate the female? Because he was drugged. Slyly, this foxy female had slipped the male the date rape drug and a dangerous amount of viagra. During intercourse, the male ripped a gaping hole in the female's stomach and killed her. He woke up confused inside a dead stinking corpse.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven hundred and eighty nine.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Rick Ross is so fat, that he is fatter than someone who isn't as fat as he is.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops