how come timmy didnt brush his teeth he didnt have a toothbrush

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Bill went into a store and bought a bagel. However, after eating it, he realizes he meant to buy a doughnut. He tells the cashier that he meant to order a doughnut, and asks for his money back. The cashier says no and the man leaves.

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what do you call a bird that is gay bird a gaybird

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You know you are really drunk if your blood alcohol Is higher than .08

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Knock Knock Who did that?

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Your mother is so fat that she has to undergo amputation of her foot because of type 2 diabetes.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Vacuum, purple, zebra.

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How do u know what a ass is. You no once you meet adam mac.

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Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?".

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your mummas so ugley that it looks like it court fire and your family put it out with forkes

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Fact: 100% of people who drink alcohol will die.

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What's worse than tornadoes in the USA? Earthquakes in Japan.

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Brandon Bass's career average for assists is 0.7 a game. guess what his nickname is bassy

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NA LINDOL BA KAPAG NATALON ANG MATATABA :8

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Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

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what's grosser then 1000 babies stapled to a tree?? 1 baby stapled to 1000 trees

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What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

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Roses are red My name is Dave This makes no sense Microwave

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You can pick your ur nose u can pick ur friends u just can't pick ur friends nose.

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Have you seen Stevie wonders new house? Neither has he.

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What do u do to blow off steam? I simply go to the top of the empire states building, poor gasoline in a bag, put a baby in it, light it on fire, and through it off the side. problem?

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How do you cut the sea in half? You can't. There are an odd amount of letters. You would have to jeopardize the "e", but then it would no longer be "sea".

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Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

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http://www.com/

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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