What did the black guy say after coming home from school? "I just got home from school."

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How many like does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? As many as it takes.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Orange That's impossible because orange's can't talk. Oh. It's Jim, I need to borrow your lawnmower.

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A chicken crosses the road... Gets fined for jaywalking.

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I got pussies, cocks, asses and bitches. In my animal store.

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How do you fit 94 jews in a volkswagon? two in the front, three in the back, and 89 in the ash tray

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Man walks into a hotel on Friday, Stays for three days and leaves on Friday. How is this possible? A. His horses name was Friday

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how do you make lady gaga cry you poke here face then rape here.

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Why is Bruce Wayne named Batman and Tim Drake named Robin? They wanted to hunt bats and robins whenever someone does something bad.

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there were three men in a car, Poop, Shut Up, and Manners. They were driving in a truck when poop fell out of the car. Manners went to get him. Shut Up parked somewhere that he wasn't supposed to so the police man came to him. He asked him what his name was and he said "Shut Up" because that was his name. The police man said "Where are your manners?" then Shut Up said,"He went to go scoop up poop".

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I was on Facebook today. Opened someones wall. Read "LIKE if you know someone that needs to be smacked in the face with a shovel." So I liked it and wrote my exboyfriend's name.......

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So a baby seal walks into a club

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What did the kitty say when it's owner called him over? Nothing. It's owner killed him.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill....Just kidding, it was only Jill. Jack had no legs

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whats long, hard and full of seamen submarine

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Your mom is so fat she weighs significantly higher then most females of her age and height.

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Roses are red violets are blue I fucked your mom now im about to fuck you to.

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Did you hear the one about Steven Hawking into a bar? I havn't either, but its probably a hoot.

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What did grandma get little Benjamin for Christmas? Nothing, she died last year

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it died. Q: Why did the dog fall out of the tree? A: Because it was tied to the monkey.

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Friends are like trees, they fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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Want to hear an anti-joke? Yes. Well I'm not going to tell you one.

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There was a joke, one sentance, and no punchline.

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''I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.''

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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