A man walks into a bar. Nothing happens that's worth explaining.

What did the white boy say to the black boy? You're black

The closest I've been to an animal charity was when I walked past it to by myself a fur coat

what did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas Cancer

Q:Whats the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? A:One less drunk

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A mechanical wheelchair.

Amazing

two snow men standing in a field and one says to the other can you smell carrots

-Have you ever seen an elephant hidden behind a thread? -No. -How come you're seeing it, he's hidden.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms

Yo mama's fat.

I have a dig bick You that read wrong You read that wrong too You read that again to make sure I'm not fucking with you

What did the legless veteran get for christmas, The same grenade that blew up his legs.

Why couldn't Suzie put on her boots? Because she got her legs amputated.

What's weird about four black men in a toilet? No one got shot.

Whats Barack Obama's favorite number ? 7

69

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Not only did 7 have that intimidating look to him, but 6 had recently found out that he was a well known mob boss who also went by the name of Lucky Seven. he was in charge of a gang called The Prime Numbers. They had been terrorizing 6's city for sometime now, whether it was stealing, mugging, or even killing or vandalism. 6 sure had a lot to fear, but he knew things might turn out well, as 6 had a great ability to try his best and do what he believed in: Justice

There's a football player who walks into a bar and sees a gay guy. The gay guy says, "So you're a football player, right?" The football player says, "Yes." The gay guy says, "I have a game of football myself. It's called fart football. It's where you drink a mug of beer in less than five seconds and then you drop your pants and fart for the extra point." The gay guy goes first. He drinks the mug of beer in less than five seconds and farts. The football player goes. He drinks the mug of beer in less than five seconds then he drops his pants and before he farts, the gay guy says, "BLOCK THAT KICK! BLOCK THAT KICK!"

What happened when a star exploded? It killed billions of other sentient beings.

Let them think that you are insane, vulnerable, and they wont bother leaking a lot of shit about you, this "shit info" will remain inaccurate and reveal weaknesses where there is none. I had to draw them away from you, but as soon as he began selling Intel regarding my missing eye, I figure our "not so friends in the unknown" would have eventually begun searching for "The one eyed man" among you. And had they not found one, they might just as likely made it seem as if there was one for the money. None of the thugs sent to attack me nor the "Nero decoys" where professionals, but those behind them sure are, considering that they paid these thugs more than what I make during a year. Gotta go pretty girl, hope we meet again in not so long. Moral: This is all a joke, get over it, Moral has left forever, mission complete.

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What did the kid with turrets say? Many swear words but he can not be blamed for this because he has a disease that make him unable to control many of the things he says.

Knock knock Go away

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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