Why did the Mexican mow lawns? He needed money to pay for his college tuition.

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What did the priest tell his son? Nothing, priests can't have children.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Nobody knows, it's impossible to determine the motivations of an animal that is incapable of speech.

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Why didn't the cab driver pick up the black man? Because the cab driver already had a passenger and it would be unprofessional to pick up another person.

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whats uglyand cry , and screams mommy ... you after i bitch slap you

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What do you say to a rock? Meow

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Friends are like trees, they fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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so a piece of grass is walking down the street..... wait a minute thats not right.

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A cowboy rides out to the middle of nowhere and then shoots his horse. He then makes his way back into town and meets a man in the saloon. The man says, "On second thought, I'd like to buy that horse."

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What's funnier than a fat person falling nothing is

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Why do black people have white hands and feet? Regardless of race or ethnicity, the skin on the palms and soles of the feet is always less pigmented than elsewhere on the body. In darker skinned people this fact is readily observable, but in light skinned people this feature of human biology cannot normally be discerned by simple visual inspection.

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a jewish duck trips over a series of metal corckswcrews and proceeds to die of ADHD the answer is 4

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Robert: wanna hear a joke? Robort:ok, shoot. Robert: *BANG!*

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Justin Beiber sings. people don't listen.

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rose's are red violets are blue bernard is mine and yours too if you hurt him in any way i'll punch you in your face and make you gay Krissc

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why does everyone like this website? ... because every other joke a little baby is dying.

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Did you hear the one about Steven Hawking into a bar? I havn't either, but its probably a hoot.

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What do you do i a stranger offers you candy? Make sure its not stale then jump in his van.

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How many dead hookers can you fit in a trunk? Five

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What's worse than being caught in a downpour? Having your kneecaps ripped out of their sockets.

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What did the day say to his son when he came out of the closet? Its alright

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Angus is so Scottish he wears a kilt when it is socially appropriate.

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What do you call a person without a heart? Not alive.

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You do realize that in my home dimension of earth, I am just lying in the sun, typing on the goddamn laptop right? I mean are you retarded OR SOMETHING? I AM THE GODDAMN MORAL MAN! Moral: Honestly though, If I where like running around shouting this, I... Would begin to get slightly worried...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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