Why did John get hard? He froze to death

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What do George Washington, JFK and Hillary Clinton have in common? They've never been to my house.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down +34

yo moma so stupid she went to the dentist for a bluetooth.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

A black man accidentally walks into a white man......they apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

A man goes into a bar. What are mangos doing in a bar?

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in every apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

why did the chicken cross the road? who cares its a chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Fill in the blank: A ______ is a man's best friend. Jake: Is it dog? Host: YES! Now for the 1 million dollars! Finish the sentence: I just saved a lot of money by Jake: Switching to Geico? Host: Sorry, that's incorrect. The correct answer is "I just saved a lot of money by not spending it on useless junk and by budgeting my account towards investing in the future." Oh well, nice try.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken a month off from working in their law firm. The mexican man, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. Alex, however never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Roses are red, Violets are blue, sorry i gave you Herpes type 2.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What do you call a black teen on Maury Povich? A mother.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

A Jehovah's Witness knocks on my door. I didn't answer the door.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What's the best part of any family reunion? Sodomy.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Go to this website and this game is an antijoke to laugh at http://iamhelenkeller.com/

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Wanna hear something irrational? Pi

thumb_up thumb_down +32

yo mamma's so fat she's fat!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I don't know why.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Your mother is so fat that when she looks in the mirror she is deeply upset by her appearance.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Two cats are sat on a window ledge. One cat looks to the other and says "Meoww".

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What's small, black and at the top of a burning building? Oh shit - I forgot my baby

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops