Uh Erron, you know, I do not spend most of the time before this computer or studying because I am popular nor anything, so that`s one thing, and yeah, I never done it with anybody so yeah, uhh lucky me or something.

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what's better than winning a gold metal at the special olympics? not being retarded.

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Policeman: Knock, knock. Woman: Who's there? Policeman: The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident. Your husband has been killed.

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the firefighter says to the other firefighter: hey firefighter, are we going to fight a fire?

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Life is like a bucket of wood shavings. Except when they're in a pail. Then it's like a pail of wood shavings.

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I heard that you could burn punds so I found a fat kid and set him on fire

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Why was the boy sad The boy wanted a puppy for his Birthday So his parents got him a Toy dog Later that year he was found dead with the Toy Dog shoved down his mouth gagging him.

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Knock knock. I have a doorbell...

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How do you kill a fox? With a gun. How do you kill a deer? With a gun.

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a disabled man takes a walk in a park

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save me from the nothing ive become

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Your mamma's so dumb, we are seriously worried she might hurt herself.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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What's funnier than Tom Cruise laughing like a badass? Chuck Norris

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Mexican? I dont care if you are Mexican or not really, it makes no difference to me, I know you, I seen you before. But seriously, I consider you a good friend and all, and it seems we both get along, but you know after stuff happens, are we still friends then or is this all just a mating game thing for you? You can be honest with me, I am a realist, and I kinda like the idea of,the day after tomorrow, wont deny that. Its just that I dont want to lose a good friend in the process, and if this is just you trying to score, then well, I guess its still nice knowing this side of you.

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How does Fred drink his milk? -computer

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what happened at the end of the korean marley and me? dinner

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Why did lil' Jenny fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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How do you tell if your lesbian lover has cheated on you? If she's pregnant.

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What happens when a man farts a fancy memorial party in a ball room in England... At least 1000 people die somewhere on earth in the time his butt squeezed out that fart. And I'm sure someone gets raped.

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What do your mum and dad have in common Not much your dads dead

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What would Abraham Lincoln do if he were alive today? Scream and scratch at the lid of his coffin.

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Q:What business did the black man break into? A: The business of show, because he was a talented actor.

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Why wasn't Abraham Lincoln a good president? Because he got shot in the head and died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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