Girl: What's up? Guy: If I told you, would you sit on it?

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What's green and fuzy and could kill you if it fell out of a tree? A pool table

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Why is Michael Jackson a bad chess player? Because he's dead.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pickles.

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roses are red,violets are blue,faces like yours belong in a zoo,but don't worry i'll be there to,not in a cage but laughing at you!

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You were born.

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What has a pie and my hand got in common? It's got meringue on it.

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If Spongebob lives in Bikini Bottom, Where is Bikini Top?

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What do you call a blonde at the beach? A dipthong.

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Q: Whats Worse Than 21 Dead Babies in a Trashbag? A: 1 Dead Baby In 21 Trashbags.

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What do you call a black guy with a gun? A police officer.

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Q:what's worse than eating outdated raviolis? A:terminal cancer.

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an object in motion continues to stay in motion unless acted upon by an external force :)

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If monkeys ate trees, than what would trees be made out of? No one knows because that will never happen.

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What's in a glass and drinky? A drink

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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A man walks into a bar falls into the street and gets run over. It was very tragic

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Do they have a fourth of July in England? Yes, but it is just a sad reminder to them that all the cool people left for America.

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so a baby seal walks into a club, the bouner immedietly kicks the seal out because it is too young to be in a club and also.....itsa seal

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What do you call a kid with no friends? ....a Sandy Hook survivor

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whats worse than a worm in your apple? the Holocaust

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Your under arrest for drug trafficking and possession of illegal firearms. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say...

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what do you get when you combine an astronaut, a microwave and a bathtub? A suicide investigation

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Bob loves Anne. Anne loves Bob. No one cares.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops