Two peanuts are walking down a dark alley. One was a honey roasted.

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A man runs over a woman wth his car. Whose fault was it? The man because he should be driving on the roads, not in the kitchen.

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worst name for a club in alaska club baby seal

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What's black and white and red all over? A bleeding penguin.

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Scenario: 2 people are in a desert. There is only 1 bottle of water left to drink. Who drinks it? Neither of them, they drink the gallon bottle of gatorade instead.

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What was Michael Jackson doing at the Dermatologist's office? He was getting a mole on his back examined to be sure it wasn't cancer.

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Goats are like mushrooms, If you shoot a duck im scared of toasters

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Two Jews walk into a bar. They order martinis and have a wonderful time.

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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Q:How do you make an accountant cry ? A: You kill his whole family

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What is brown and smells like bacon? Bacon

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Knock Knock Who's There? Nobody, you have no friends.

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Roses are red, I have a phone, nobody texts me, forever alone...

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Knock knock Who's there? Happy 9/11

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a picnic table? The average picnic table can support a family of four, while a Mexican person, depending on his or her career, can support families that include over four people.

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What happens to koala bears when the forests of Australia catch on fire? They burn.

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My mom touched my wiener : \

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What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13.

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How do you stop an assassin? Kill their target

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What has an extra toe and is a bad role model for little girls? Miley Cyrus.

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Q: Whats big, strong, black, and sexy? A: Your imaginary dick

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boy1: whats blue and goes blub blub? boy2:i dont know boy1:a blue blub blub boy1: whats green and goes blub blub? boy2:a green blub blub boy1:no. there is no such thing called a green blub blub

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What's a vampire's favorite subject in school? Probably math.

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What's the difference between a Jew and firewood? Firewood is meant to be burned in a fireplace while Jews are functioning members of society

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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