You are in an airplane, and you have 500 bricks. You throw one out the door. How many do you have? 499. What are the 3 steps to putting an elephant in a fridge? 1-open the door,2-put the elephant in,3-close the door. How do you put a giraffe in the fridge? You open the door, take the elephant out, put the giraffe in, and shut the door. The lion king is having a party for all the animals… which one didn't go? The giraffe, it's in the fridge. An old lady is trying to cross an alligator infested river. She makes it over. How? The alligators are at the party. She dies anyway. How? She gets hit by the brick you threw out of the window.

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A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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Why are ginger's jokes not funny? Because they're gingers.

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Autism... is not funny at all, it is a serious issue in today's day and age and must be addressed and cured

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what do you call something that dosint exist? nothing.

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Dad, if I say shit or somethin... Dad: FALCOWN PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANCH!

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What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a woman? Intercourse.

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What's 9 + 10 19

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knock knock who's there boo boo who why are you crying it's just a joke

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four blondes where on their way to disneyworld they see a sign that say disneyworld:left so they turn around wondering where disneyworld went

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What do a cow and a banana have in common? Neither of them is a police officer.

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Why did the baby stop laughing? Would you if you pooped your pants?

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Mogok Papiti.

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Johnny has 32 cookies. He eats 28 of them. What does he have now? Diabetes, Johnny has diabetes.

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Stacey has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Stacey.

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Why did the 2 black kids jump the barb-wired fence To get to the other side

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue This poem makes no sense Trampoline

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So, there's three blondes. Two of them walk into a bar. The third one missed it.

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whats black white and red all over an abused child

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What does a homeless guy do when he's hungry ? Nothing, he has no food.

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Why did I get thumbs down from everyone? Answer: Because they hate my anti-joke.

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What's worst then a road kill? Multiple road kils.

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What did the Jews say before they got of the bus? Let's make like a Jewish kid's forskin and get the hell out of here.

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Nathan likes butt games with African American men

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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