Roses are red Violets are FUCKING VIOLET NOT FUCKING BLUE

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A horse walks in to a bar. The bartender asks: "why the long face?" The horse didn't respond, because it's a horse.

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knock knock who's there your moms dead im sorry

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pretty soon we'll all be dead

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

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Why is six afraid of seven? Six isn't actually afraid of seven. It is true that seven devoured nine's carcass, but one has to understand that cannibalism is not a taboo in their culture. In the world of cardinal numbers, protein is precious and leaving corpses to rot is dangerously unsanitary. You should not judge them by the standards of human society. It's ignorant and offensive.

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A blonde fails an exam because she did not study

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What starts with S and end in H-I-T? shit.

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What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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Why did billy have a frog stapled to his face? Because he was having a bad day.

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A plumber walks into a bar and the bartender says "What will it be?" and the plumber says "no drinks thank you, I'm here to fix the toilet."

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Why was the Tyrannosaurus Rex such an aggressive animal? it had short arms so it could not masturbate.

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Q: What's black and blue and is all over Timmy's mother? A: The bruises his father gave her when he came home drunk.

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Women are only good for seventy-one things: Love A proper home to come home to everyday 69

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Why did the soccer player miss practice? He got shot in the face.

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There are a black guy and a Mexican in a car, who`s driving? The cops

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What do you call a one legged , one eyed, canadian fisherman called Samuel Browning? Mr Browning unless you are on friendly terms then Sam is fine.

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Your mama's so stupid that i wouldn't be surprised if you were to tell me that she didn't graduate high school.

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What do the Mexican man, the Asian man and the Jewish man all have in common? "man"

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What did the fish say when he swam into a wall? ouch.

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What happens when you stick your hand down the jelly bean jar? The black one steals your watch.

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Yo mamas so fat that when a bus hit her she said " who threw that pebble at me"

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There's a 4 door kayak going down the street and it loses a wing. How many doughnuts fit in a dog house? And remember its not yellow, because snakes don't have armpits.

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If a tree falls in the forrest and a women hears it does it make a sound? Why is there a tree in the kitchen.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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