Why do depressed people like sharp knives? Cause there good for cutting Salad

Why was the fat kid the last one to lunch? He'd had lead bricks stapled to his ankles by the skinny kids.

What did the woman say to the black man in bed Good morning honey

How do you get a bear out of tree? You shoot it

someone had sex with Justin bieber end result Justin went into labor

what did one tree say to the other spruce up actually nothing because trees can't talk

Why do dinosaurs have no friends? Because they are dead

A man walks into a bar. His family has died in a tragic accident and he is trying to drink down the pain.

Whats worse than the Holocaust? reading posts on this website that arent antijokes. Seriously poeople... you cant just say something that random than put something tragic. it has to be funny and tragic.

What's puby and dandruffy? Aodhan Hearty

What did the dying mother give her newborn child? AIDS

Knock Knock No one's home Okay, I'll come back later.

there was this kid who was perfectly well-adjusted, had most normal things a person needs and a generally good life. what did he get for Christmas. non-hodgkins lymphoma.

why did the baby fall out of the tree? the monkey dropped it. why did the monkey drop the baby? it was dead.

What can fly, but is always under you? A flying worm.

Whats funny about a fat person dying? He died while eating friend chicken

A black man, a white man and a Jewish man all live in the same apartment block. Which is most likely to be at work? None of them, it's Sunday. [L]

what did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? were both lawyer's.

a horse walks into a bar. Noticing the potentially dangerous situation everyone leaves, the bartender calls RSPCA who come and retrieve the horse and order is restored.

Why is six afraid of seven? Six isn't actually afraid of seven. It is true that seven devoured nine's carcass, but one has to understand that cannibalism is not a taboo in their culture. In the world of cardinal numbers, protein is precious and leaving corpses to rot is dangerously unsanitary. You should not judge them by the standards of human society. It's ignorant and offensive.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

What did the boy in the wheelchair get for Christmas? A bicycle.

pretty soon we'll all be dead

Why did the soccer player miss practice? He got shot in the face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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