What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

Q. What did the toothbrush say to the toothpaste A. Nothing you idiot there inanimate objects they can't talk

What do you call a women with 2 black eyes? Hopefully nothing because abuse is something that shouldn't be messed with and it is wrong.

What did the fridge say to the watermelon? Nothing.

A brunette, redhead, and a blond were on a road trip when their car broke down in the middle of a desert. The red-head offered to walk down the road to get help, for none of them knew how to repair the car. She walked down the road in the direction they were headed, but never came back. The redhead and blond died several days later in the shade of the car as a result of extensive heat exhaustion.

Knock knock Who's there? Dishes Dishes who? Dishes a bad joke

what is blue and smells like fish? blue fish ;)

Knock knock. Who's there? Your mother.

XD, I know I noticed myself, I was like "why the fuck did I post that shit?" Rellez XD okay sistah, I think I am just gonna get some sleep now, but Nero, is not Justin Bibble the first one?

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

Why did the squirrel cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

Whats worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bees stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings. Now, if you have been well-educated you should be able to tell the problem with this joke. Unless you know someone whos jewish and lived during the holocaust, you couldn't be sure if three bee stings was actually worse than the holocaust. If ou do however, thats good for you, keep it to yourself.

Justin Bieber's gay!! My butt is sexier!(;

Why was the black man hired at the clothing store? He needed some money to feed his family.

Why does Suzie like to wear sunglasses? Because she's blind.

Did you hear the joke about the deaf mail man? No. Neither did he.

Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

what did the cop say to the robber... freeze bitch hope you like prison food and penis

Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

A blond and his wife were in the hospital expecting their first child together. The wife gives birth to twins and the husband turns to her and says, "I can't believe we had twins. I'm so happy!"

what's the diferance between a boner and a lambroghini? I dont have a lambroghini

Nero, seriously, one way or the other, ill kill you, my mom blushes like every time people talk to her so fuck you, my sister if you touch her, ill.... Man, stop and ill forgive you, and I am very very sorry, now stop sending me those pics, and please do not post them anywhere, Line would not want to.

A black man and a white man were both pulled over for street racing. They both were also found to be drunk driving. Only the black man was arrested. It turns out the black man had just massacred an entire Amish village before going street racing to celebrate.

If life gives you lemons, you're setting up a bad joke

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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