A blind man asked me out last night. I told him I was seeing someone...

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How many politicians does it take to screw in a light bulb? Ten. One to actually screw it in, and nine to stand around and say, "I can do it better."

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guess what What? Apsolutly nothing

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idear.

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Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead

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What do you get when you combine lemons, sugar and water? Lemons, sugar, and water

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What's the difference between a black person and cancer? If you don't know already, you should really question your countries education system and your parents upbringing.

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What would you call the Flinstones if they were black? Niggas

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Roses are brown, Violets are brown, WHO THE HELL $#!T IN MY GARDEN?!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to get hit and die

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Why can't Dave drive? Because Dave is an orange.

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What happens when you give a boy a cookie? He falls asleep and his parents think he was kidnapped by a serial killer.

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So three ants are in a straight line. The first ant said there's an ant behind me, the second ant said there's an ant behind me, and the third ant said there's an ant behind me. Why is this? The third ant lied.

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Whats white and goes up? a confused snowflake

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What do you get when you throw a white hat in the red sea? A wet hat.

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A horse walks in to a bar. The barman says: "Why the long face?" The horse does not reply because it is a horse and can neither speak nor understand English. The horse is startled by it's surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables on it's way out.

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What is the difference between a brick and a ginger? The entirety of their chemical make up and physical appearance.

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Why didn't the plane crash... because of the wight male piloting it

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What did the little boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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A tiger walks into bar. He orders a drink and leaves. The tiger's name was Tony the tiger," It was just a man wearing a costume for the cereal company.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Two men fought over a bag of peanuts. The peanuts won.

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What do you call a black man eating a chair. I don't know and this is highly unlikely because chairs are inedible therefore this circumstance is impossible.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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