Why cant i stand up? Cause i shat my pants

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, My family is dead

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Mine.

69 cents for a rainbow donut shaped as a 69....

What's worse than getting a apple and finding a worm in it. Getting hit in the face with a meteorite.

Why did the little boy grow up to be a homosexual man? He didn't find the female reproductive system sexually appealing

Why the babie was not drinking his milk? He was dead.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You smell like ass, And no one loves you!

Roses are red Violets are blue I don't know how to rhyme Refrigerator ------------

what did one bean say to the other bean??? hows it been.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

okay so theres this guy.

How does a t-rex eat spaghetti? He didn't he ate a velocaraptor instead.

A black man is in line for a club. The bouncer says: This is a white party only. The black man says: Damn, I wasnt aware I had to wear white clothing. He then left the line and told himself to check the promotional page on facebook more often.

"knock Knock" "Who's there?" "The SS, we heard you are smuggling jews in your attic, so you are coming with us."

Q: What did Jenna Jameson say when she heard hard banging near the front door? A: Come inside

Why couldn't the Joker browse the internet? He was using Compuserve.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? A vet.

the canadian, the chinese man, and the black guy walk into the at different times and buy different things

Hitler and Jews become friends.

Justin Bieber walked into a strip club. Selena Gomez wasn't there.

Yo mama is so fat, she just had a heart-attack.

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't, she's a woman.

Q: how do you stop a baby's crying keeping you up at night A: pull out it's wind pipe

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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