Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the third cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the second cat. Why did the fourth cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the fifth cat fall out of the tree? It needed to get down, but couldn't find any other way down. After he fell, he was minorly hurt and ate some cat food.

what happens when you wake up inception

Knock knock Who's there? Happy 9/11

What's worse than people repeating a joke about a handicapped child and voting down original, funny, anti-material? Knowing that millions of cubic decimetres of precious air and thousands of tonnes of food are being wasted every day to sustain them...

Why did the pigeon rape itself? It had mental issues.

What does an elephant and a red soda have in common? Neither collects stamps.

I used to work at a lightbulb factory... I made the filaments

What do you call a giraffe driving a car?.. Your Imagination

You're mama's so fat: she has to wear plus size clothing

Man 1: What kinds of phones do snails use? Man 2:I don't know, I don't think they do. Snail: The snail said nothing, snails don't speak.

Q: How many cows does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Infinite, cows do not have thumbs, in fact, they have hooves. This disables them from holding any large objects without the use of their mouthes.

"Doctor, doctor! I think I've got Chlamydia!" "Yes, so you have told me. The urine sample you provided me with last week has come back positive. I'm sorry, sir, but you'll never be able to have children."

Oh my god, I'm on fire! Help me, help me, oh God it's everywhere!

A black man without problems.

Knock knock, come in.

What did the snake say to the rat?

how do you get a girl to stop ignoring you? you kill her family with her watching.

I heard the new Batman movie was to die for

A man was chopping wood, he then brought the wood to his house and lit a fire.

Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell into the mud.

When did the Chinese guy go to the dentist? At the correct time he had been allotted.

What's worse then finding out that your partner has AIDS? I don't know actually, but finding out would suck pretty bad...

What did the guard say to the... I was going to finish this anti-joke but I took an arrow to the knee.

How do you keep Helen Keller distracted? Find a stimulating device that blind and deaf people can operate correctly.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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