how did the fat guy fall off the swing? the chain on the right side broke because of is eccesive weight that he probably should have lost last year on biggest loser.

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this going to be my new text thingy! i dont have a phone! WATS UP!

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What did the thin Italian say to the fat Italian? I don't know, I can't speak Italian.

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What do you call a white man circled by 11 black men? D12

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out that your mother just got raped by ten black men and then coming home to her dead body and getting raped by the same men who raped your mom.

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Why was the deaf boy crying at Christmas? He got an iPod.

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A kid is riding down the street when his chain pops off his bicycle. The kid yells "God damn!" as he begins to fix it. A priest walking nearby overhears the boy taking god's name in vein and says "Don't say 'God damn' say 'God help us'". The kid says, "I am an atheist, get away from me".

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Knock, Knock Open the fucking Door

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A murder, a cheater, and a liar walk into a bar..... Woah the aptriots must be in town -Rocco Tufano

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Knock knock! Who's there? Wrong house. I apologize.

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How do you stop a baby from crying? Put it in the microwave

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Popsicles

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police. We know about the cocaine.

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Q: What happens when you eat all the potatoes A: They are all gone

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Your mother is so fat that she will die relatively early because of poor health.

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A dog walks into a bar. A patron checks its tags and promptly calls the owner.

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What do you get when you mix life and cyanide? Death.

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Why couldn't Spiderman pay his rent? He didn't have enough money.

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

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A man walks into bar. Which is no surprise as he'd been drinking heavily and his spacial awareness was poor at the best of times.

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do you want my comeback? its in your mums mouth

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Why did the chicken cross the road? A manufacturing defect in the chain link fence released several chickens who are now freely roaming the area.

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Zach Murfitt has a small Willy!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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