Q. What's like a square block of ice? A. A refrigerator.

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How did the osprey find the fish? He searched for it.

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What did the fish say when it swam into the concrete wall? Nothing. Fish cannot speak

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Why do black people ride Septa? Because septa is an affordable and convenient means of transportation.

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what do you get from sleeping with a hooker? An orgasm

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist.

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what did one cow say to the other cow. nothing as its mouth was filled with grass thus it could not speak or it would be deemed as rude.

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My nipple is bleeding

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Why was Jane absent from school today? Because she got mugged on her way there, and soon after was hit by a passing bus.

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What happened to the cat How should I know it's not my cat

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What is obama's favorite place to eat? Subway

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Why was the man angry? Because I slept with his wife.

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Amedeo Clemente Modigliani was an Italian artist who worked mainly in France. Primarily a figurative artist, he became known for paintings and sculptures in a modern style characterized by mask-like faces and elongation of form. He died in Paris of tubercular meningitis, exacerbated by poverty, overwork, and addiction to alcohol and narcotics.

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Are you a homophobe? No I'm straight. ,.

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did the dog explode? because it didn't have a bum hole

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45.

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France never surrender.

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So much oil was spilled into the ocean that it is killing animals.

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Q : Why did the girl fall off the swimset ? A : Gravity pulls smaller masses towards larger masses, so the girl being the smaller mass, got attracted to the bigger mass, AKA the Earth, and that's why she fell.

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chuck norris is a little b|tch

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How many dead babies can u fit in a bath tub 17

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You have three biscuits. Your friend eats two. How many biscuits do you have? A: 3 Your friend is bulemic so he throws them both up, so you still have them.

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What did the baby get for his 1st birthday? Nothing, he was a Harlequin baby, therefore dying during the last stages of pregnancy.

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Why didn't Hellen Keller just wear glasses? Oh wait

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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