Guy finds lamp in the desert and rubs it three times. No genie appears because there's no such thing as magic.

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What's the difference between a statue and a real human? The statue can't run if the birds shit on it.

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Why does beyonce sing "to the left to the left?" cause women have no rights

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why did john wear a red hat? because blue is his favorite color

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are you from tennesse? cuase you sure look like a f u c k e d up redneck

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How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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What stops a train? A missile

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ms caissie is secretly laughing at these...

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Why did Jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Certainly not Jimmy.

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A Priest and a Rabbi walk into a bar together. They discuss the fundamentals and aspects of Religion.

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how do you make abus driver cry? you rip his limbs off.

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Believing in God may be a sign of autism Kappa

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What would have happend if martin Luther king was white? I don't know he wasn't so it's irrelevant

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What's the difference between a taxidermist and an astronomer ? They have a different job.

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2 wales are at the bar one looks at the other and dose a wale call for 5 long minutes and the other one reply's "dude your drunk we got to go"

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What is covered in red and has two legs? Half a cat.

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What is a ghost's favorite appetizer? Ghosts aren't real.

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Why was Timmy late for class? He got hit by a bus. Why was Jimmy late for class? He saw Timmy lying in the middle of the street, went out to help and got hit by another bus.

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Why did the farmer cross the road? To catch the chicken

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What did Stephen Hawking say to a prostitute? Push me, and then just touch me, Till I can get my, Satisfaction.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a house? A: babies lack the intelligence and motor skills to accomplish such a task so it is not practical to hire them for a painting job.

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Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LPFTeHEsAS4 You will not be disappointed.

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Random link time! http://www.booksie.com/thrillers/novel/declan_mckimm/pure-evil

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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