Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay guys house Knock Knock Who's there? The chicken

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How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

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Roses are red, my name is Dave, this poem makes no sense, microwave

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I did it. the Bulls fan Took a few hours on Microsoft word. then I copy and pasted it on this!

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This statement is false.

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Q: How do you kill a goblin if the fries are next to the sushi? A: Yes. Walruses have nostrils and rubber chickens don't like microwaves!

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Why did the man eat the turnip greens? Because he was morbidly obese, and needed to maintain a proper diet.

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A man was feeling sick and decided to go and see a doctor. He saw the doctor and then went home. He wasn't feeling any better so he decided to get checked-out by the doctor.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have five fingers, The middle one's for you.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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how does a chinese chick check if she's pregnant? swallows a rubix cube and if it comes out solved shes pregnant

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why did the black go to the KFC because he likes fried chicken

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Whats big orange and likes to eat rocks? a big orange rock eater

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Knock, knock. Who's there? "Dwane!" I don't know any Dwane. Perhaps you have the wrong address. "Oh. Sorry to have bothered you!"

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What is green and has wheels? A blue car.

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Q: What's worse than both of your parents dying in a terrible car accident? A: Sitting in the back seat with your grandparents.

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A blone walks into a bank in New York City and asks the bank teller for a $5000 loan because she's going to Mexico for 2 weeks. The bank teller said he would need some security for the money. The blonde tells him her new Rolls Royce is in the parking Lot and she hands him the keys. The blonde gets the money and goes on her trip. Another employee at the bank then parks the car in the underground parking garage. He later ffinds out the blonde is a multi millionaire. When the blonde arrives home from she pays back the $5000 and $15 interest. When the bank teller asks her why she gave them a $250000 car for security or needed the $5000 loan if she was a multi millionaire, the blonde answers, "Where else can you park your car in New York City and expect it to stillbe there when you return?"

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A black guy and a white guy are arguing over what race god is. So they go to god and ask what race he is. They never got their answer, because god doesn't exist.

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What do you say to a dead man who knocks on your door? Nothing, you shoot him cause he's a zombie

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Why did silly Miss Sally put her baby in the dishwasher? Because she was suffering from advanced stages of Schizophrenia. She thought that her baby was a dish. Her mother, Carol watched in horror as her granddaughter was placed inside. A tear dribbled from her eye. Things had been bad, but because Sally was her daughter, she had been tolerant. Carol sobbed as the baby screamed in terror, unable to escape. Finally, Carol, tears in her eyes, called Child Protective Services on her own daughter, something she didn't want to do. When CPS representatives finally came, they were horrified at the sight of a screaming baby covered in suds with burnt skin that had been scorched by hot jets. Sally's baby, Alex was taken from her and put into foster care.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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A bear walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "I would like a rum and............ Coke." The bartender asks, curiously, "What's up with the big pause?" The bear looks down at his paws, embarrassed, and mumbles under his breath, "social anxiety."

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"What would Jesus do?" "Form a religion, get nailed to a cross, and become a martyr to millions."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops